Dear Mama — Restaurant in New York

I’m from the neighborhood and was born & raised in Harlem. Please avoid this place at all cost, they are extremely rude and unprofessional. I really tried to like this place because I have previously been to their East Harlem location and really enjoyed it so I was very happy they found a new home here, in my neighborhood. Especially since I just moved back to the neighborhood after living in the Sugarhill area of Harlem. But the vibes are so off with this place.

I’ll start by saying that the space itself is gorgeous, so much light due to all the windows, trees & plants are around and they have music playing and offer events such as live music and movie nights. However, the drink quality is inconsistent and I usually have to be pretty detailed in my order to make sure they don’t mess it up but that wouldn’t be so bad if the staff were actually personable and nice.

I went earlier today and ordered a muffin (warmed up) and an iced chai latte. It took an unusual amount of time to receive my drink & muffin, the staff were moving like snails behind the bar. I asked for cinnamon when I ordered my iced chai which did have some but when I asked for more the barista told me with a slight attitude that the drink already had cinnamon (like girl, is this coming out your paycheck???) I simply said that I knew but wanted a little more, to which she added a very cheap sprinkle. Why not just leave cinnamon out? I’m confused especially as this is the second this happened to me just THIS week. I had gone to the cafe on Tuesday due to it being a very nice day and ordered an iced chai latte and when I asked for cinnamon, she (different barista) reluctantly gave me a quick sprinkle. My muffin wasn’t warmed when I received it, the outside was very lukewarm and the inside had absolutely no warmth to it. I went back and asked if they could warm it again which also took an unusual long time. But honestly all of that wouldn’t be an issue if it weren’t for the attitudes of the staff. They seemed rude and looked like they didn’t want to be bother in engaging customers. All except the young man behind the register, he was so nice and just had a great smile and attitude. I left without finishing either my drink or muffin, that’s who bad my experience.

Overall, every time I’ve gone there I do not feel welcomed at all, which is hilarious since this cafe, just like Columbia University which they are affiliated with are interlopers here. It’s the same old story I’ve seen in Harlem with these cafes like Dear Mama, Sugarhill Cafe, Monkey Cup etc. Predominantly white staff in a Black neighborhood that continues to be pushed out by gentrifiers. I know that they won’t likely listen to any of this because I’ve seen how the owner interacts with the Google reviews and they're also connected to Columbia University so likely won’t lose business. But if you’re interested in a Black owned cafe who owners are actually from the neighborhood & who create an environment that actually fosters community check out The Oma Shop, they have 2 locations. Another good one is NBHD Brûlée which is also...

I’ve come here before and thought “wow, such a great atmosphere, but very overpriced for mediocre food.” Still, I’m not averse to over paying for coffee that comes with a good atmosphere and some convenience to get work done.

I am very busy, and this afternoon needed a place to stop and get some work done while scarfing down my lunch. I was more than happy to over pay for a mediocre cup of coffee.

My bag unpacked, my computer out and connected to WiFi and deep into work, I unwrapped and made it halfway through my burrito before I was told “I can’t be eating outside food.” Well ma’am, I was clearly unaware of the policy, and unfortunately I have already eaten outside food before you made it to me. I looked at my half eaten burrito (which most would agree is probably the least reversible meal once started…) and looked back at her. She seemed to empathize, but said “my manager told me to say this, it’s not me” and she quickly stepped away.

It was raining. I do not possess the witchcraft required to recompose my burrito. Yes, this was a frustrating interaction. Understanding basic principles of courtesy and customer service it is hard to understand why “next time, please keep this in mind” would not be the message for a paying customer.

When I asked to speak to this faceless manager, I was told that they had stepped away (like 45 seconds after this all happened?) a second barista who also seemed to empathize was happy to process a refund for my over priced decaf so I could walk back into the rain without feeling totally ripped off.

To this manager - it’s pretty simple. If you’re not an a-hole, a customer will probably return. It’s not that hard to not be an a-hole. People do it every day. In fact many of your employees who presumably report into you do it just fine. If you must be an a-hole, it’s weird to ask a young employee to do it for you and then scurry away immediately after…

Your food is not great, the price is absurd for what you get. As a coffee shop with a good ambiance and decent enough coffee there is plenty of reason to stop in and be a customer while getting some work done. You make money when I buy your coffee.. Asking me to leave in the rain and waste an already opened burrito does not encourage me to come back and purchase your mediocre overpriced sandwich next time, it encourages me to leave and never return.

Had I been politely told “so sorry, feel free to finish what you’ve started but next time know that we don’t allow outside food. I’m sorry we didn’t mention when we saw the chipotle bag in your hand!” That would have been a completely reasonable interaction.

Dunkin’ Donuts scores much higher...

On May 31st, after brunch at Dinosaur Bar-B-Que, I walked around the neighborhood and stopped at Dear Mama. It's a light-filled cafe with beautiful indoor plants and lots of indoor seating (some outdoor seating).

At the counter, I ordered a chai latte from a friendly gentleman and picked it up from the female barista standing next to him. My beverage had too much milk, for my liking, so I went up to the same barista and asked if she could add more chai. She was sorta short and directed me to the same man who had taken my order. The line had grown, so I decided to just accept my drink (I didn't finish it though).

I'll go back to Dear Mama, since I'll soon be at the Wallach Art Gallery, nearby. I'll order my usual (a chai latte) and update then.

Update:

Response from the owner on July 4th, "Oh, Oscar. Bless your heart."

I don't understand why Dear Mama is giving me such a snarky and unprofessional response. I didn't make the poorly made chai latte... don't take your anger out on me.

Update:

On July 5th, Dear Mama left me this comment on Instagram, "😂🥸😝🌶️🌶️🌶️"

To which, I replied, "I don't even know what that means, because I'm not a child, but now I understand why your initial response was so immature and again, unprofessional. (Are the chilis a racist remark, because I'm Latino? Actually, I don't care.) I see that the people, leaving bad reviews for Dear Mama, are telling the truth. Bad management and/or bad owner... if this establishment is an homage to Dear Mama, she'd be ashamed."

I've changed my rating to a one star, because of Dear Mama's horrible responses to my mild and fair review. I definitely won't be back and I'll make sure to tell people to stay away from this unprofessional business. They're awful.

Update: Again, on July 5th, Dear Mama left me a second comment on Instagram, "Dear Oscar - Come over to Dear Mama for a Chai on us….and a cookie. We’d love to see you again and you could meet the whole team."

I replied, "and a cookie." Being passive-aggressive is extremely immature and unprofessional. If you continue to harass me, I'll report you."

The Dear Mama representative, who responds to reviews, must be unhappy/crazy. Actually, one of their responses was just emojis... a place of business has someone responding to customers in emojis (not words). Btw, It's very easy to hide behind such childish responses, when other people don't know your full name or see a photo of the person...