Bilheteira — Restaurant in Santa Cruz

Appalling slow service and easily the worst “food” we have had in our to date 4.5 weeks in Madeira. We arrived a little after 1500, ordered some beers, which arrived relatively promptly, plus garlic bread, which admittedly was excellent. However, it was all downhill thereafter, as another 40 minutes went by before our meals arrived, other, later customers getting their food before we did. When it was eventually delivered, after intervention from our friend visiting the kitchen to inquire, my mixed grilled fish was largely inedible, either full of bones (and I don’t mind bones, but when it’s almost all bones, what's the point?), or overcooked to beyond rubber, with boiled potatoes which were cold (I added plastic packeted mayonnaise to turn it into a boring potato salad). The salad itself was fine. Our friend’s pork “stew” looked disgusting, grey and fatty; he smothered it in piri piri sauce in order to force some of the morsels of actual meat down. I should also mention the ladies’ loo was filthy, couldn't get out of there quickly enough. Such a disappointing end to our friends’ visit before heading back to the airport, I hope never to darken their...

Walked into this place, not as my first choice but unexpectedly suprised by it all. Staff may have difficulty with the English language but they try their best. I ordered the local fish with banana and damn it was soooooo good. Fresh and crips and just for € 16 you get a proper plate of food and makes you leave very satisfied. I don’t like to return to the same restaurant and order the same food when I am on holiday but for this place and this dish I gladly make an exception!

4,5/5

Just a few days later I came in for dinner here again, remembering how good it was last time. Well…things had turned 180 degrees. The owner “helped” me, acually the only thing he said was “what do you want?”. I had to wait over 20 minutes before my beer finally arrived and had to ask for condiments like salt and pepper. Still waiting on my mayonaise for the fries. The fish seemed to shrunk from last time and the salad turned out to be shaved carrot. The girl that works there as well seemed to be very busy and I feel sorry for her because looked like they were understaffed and she was working over her head.

This time it was just a 2/5

Hopefully you have the luck I had...

We had seafood rice for 2 and after eating amazing food at Madeira for a week this was the worst experience on our last evening. The seafood rice arrived in a massive pot which looked impressive but it was more of a soup and I was a bit disappointed as we had a soup as a starter. The limpets and other seafood had so much sand that it was impossible to eat! It was disguising... The funny fact is that the owner (I believe he is a man in his 60s) approached us when we were studying the menu and had a good English, but when we explained him about the dish and the sand he pretended that he doesn't understand English! No apology, absolutely nothing. However, we paid for everything. I also ordered my 4 year old spaghetti bolognese and would not recommend this either. When we finished eating nobody came to us for over 20 mins but was walking past by. Really gutted about this experience. Please choose something else, there are plenty of places to...