The Hawk — Restaurant in Ashland

Yes they have lots of options and yes they try their best to account for as many people's dietary restrictions as possible but I still have a few issues with the Hawk's food.

As a vegetarian, most of the veggies served are so drenched in oil that they loose their original flavor and just become a mode of transportation for grease to pool from the pan, to your plate, and into your mouth.

The Hawk frequently mislabels their food which has resulted in myself experiencing diarrhea after consuming soup that wasn't labeled as being milk based. Another issue which hapens so frequent it's almost comical (almost) it the complete disregard for labeling dishes that have soy in them. If I put something on my plate and discover that it isn't showing what is described on the board, then you can bet I'll put that dish right onto the cleaning racks.

My biggest gripe with the Hawk isn't the Hawks fault at all. It's the schools policy to make every freshman live on campus and it is also policy that every freshman must have a meal plan. I am a lactose intolerant vegetarian who eats a paleo diet. I know that this is very picky of me, but it's a choice of my free will and it leaves me with the options to get a salad, a lettuce wrapped sandwich, or raw fruits and veggies most days. That's not a lot of variety for the next 6 months I'll be living here. Even worse, if I were somehow able to leave the meal plan the micro fridge in my dorm isn't big enough to meal prep and I would basically be spending all of my time cooking instead...

Lots of pros and cons at The Hawk. Their food selection itself is good; they offer a wide variety of options during breakfast, lunch, and dinner. You can sometimes order a handmade omelette for breakfast, you can always order a custom sandwich, and usually, they have the grill going with some good options. The place is well put together, with enough space to accommodate all of its visitors most of the time. However, there are many students who report having gotten food poisoning here, sometimes on multiple occasions. The food isn't always prepared properly; you can usually tell when a good chef is on shift and when they're not. They also don't offer a good variety for vegetarians or vegans. They will occasionally offer special food menu items, but this is not as common as it should be because those meals almost always taste good. Also, first year students are automatically charged for meals at The Hawk, which in my opinion there should be an option to opt out of the meal plan when registering. The employees are generally helpful, and can become so focused sometimes that it seems like they don't care even though they usually do care (which, as a former restaurant worker, I completely understand). If this place would take student feedback seriously, it could become a much better place to eat. Still, for its convenience and its sometimes good meals, I give...

Every once in a while a man with a ring of keys comes by to unlatch a chef from the wall. No one knows where they take them.

One time I saw someone get their ashes spread here.

The last time I talked to the general manager, I left convinced that this building would survive all forms of armageddon out of pure spite. Even so, they still have to fly in a bishop every other month to bless this unholy place so that god doesn't eradicate it.

Preparing for a Hawk insertion is a dangerous game. I recommend 4 pills of potassium iodide, level 4 body armor, 50 feet of rope (more if you can), and a 12 gauge. bring enough shells to take out the daily special, and then yourself. Remember: blink twice if you need extraction.

The biggest breakthrough Hawk scientists ever achieved is making pulled pork that is simultaneously soggy, yet dry. I've never seen a tapeworm beg for mercy until my buddy tried the rice here. Not only was it more overcooked than a burn victim, but it was also unbearably salty. Who the hell salts rice? If you told me the CIA developed this food to torture prisoners, I'd believe you.

Start off with small portions, you'll build up...