Border Foundry Restaurant and Bar — Restaurant in Laredo

We went to the Border Foundry Restaurant in Laredo, Texas for a friend’s Birthday. You know, it gets old being cynical and always having to ask one’s self “Why don’t we see how Laredo can screw THIS one up?” Well, our night at Border Foundry went ahead and amazed us once again. First, our friend told us we had a table held for a party of 6 at 7:30pm. The Foundry does not take “reservations” but, “they’ll hold a table for us as long as we’re there within 15 minutes”. Our friend agreed to this breezy, unbinding on their part, situation over the phone. Upon arriving, our table was not held, or anything of the sort. We were at that time informed that there would be a 30-45 minute wait. We were happy to sit in the waiting area and order drinks, which didn’t come after 15 minutes of waiting. We, the men in our group, went up to the bar and procured the drinks and served them to our wives ourselves. The server who took our drinks came by a half hour after to stare at us, puzzled as to who brought us our drinks (I’m sure another half hour was spent trying to track down the culprit to make sure nobody was horning in on tips instead of just taking the hint and getting in gear, but, whatever..). Our 30-45 minute wait turned into an hour and 20 minutes before one in our group actually went and complained. We finally got seated around 8:50pm. The Menu: Wow. They better have good food right? Well they have expensive food, if that’s what you’re looking for. Nothing under $16 per plate. Ah, but this is an upscale place.. I ordered one of the “specials”. One of those that the waiter has to tell you about, it’s not on the menu. It’s so special. I ordered the Redfish on Dirty Rice with a Shrimp Etouffee sauce. At this point, I can’t tell you why I ordered a fish dish in the desert of south Texas, but I did. Maybe because I wanted something other than tacos…hmm. Anyway, my fish came out undercooked and rubbery. Undercook a steak any day and nobody gets hurt, undercook fish and you’re headed for problems. The waiter was aghast at what the cook had prepared me and took it away. I refused a new dish, and the waiter assured me that the manager would come out to make a “table touch” as is customary whenever plates are served wrong, or service is poor. The manager never showed. The rest of our friends finished with their overpriced meals and we left. The portions are small, overpriced, and oftentimes not cooked correctly. Border Foundry is a typical example of Laredo, Texas letting its own Awesomeness get the better of itself, once again. Upon walking in, it looks like an upscale, classy, vogue New York café bar, complete with the quintessential brick walls with the stylish “accidental” overly sloppy mortar running down. The bar is beautiful, but has a misplaced random buffalo head. Because, when you think of upscale café bars and high-end cuisine, you think buffalo heads. Ah but, we’re in Texas. Where there’ve been buffalo running around for the last 100 years… Whatever. Border Foundry is too small. It’s cramped and has a forever wait time. The food is average and overpriced. The venue is simply a status place for locals to go and cram up on a Friday night. Everyone shows up, but nobody ever leaves. Border Foundry tries to replicate big city, high society class, charm and sophistication found in New York or Washington D.C. and the only thing it gets right are the prices and the wait time. If you really love and want to treat your friends, family, spouse, etc. to a night out (and it has to be in Laredo, that is..) take them to Chili’s on Mcpherson. I guarantee a...

From Fish to Fishy

The collapse of a once upon a time great establishment is the more saddening because it leaves our little postage stamp of native soil more desolate, our stomachs more upset, and our pockets more enraged at the abusive pricing of a place that never was cheap to begin with. The salmon pizza I ordered last night, my first outing in more than a year, seemed designed by an evil magician with the sole purpose of torturing my palate to unsufferable extremes. The purported "house-smoked salmon" turned out to be a rather disgusting pinkish, fishy affair that tasted as if the whole watery body of the world's oceans had been concentrated in it. Don't get me wrong, I mean not the delicate savor of seawater fruits that take our palate on a mystical voyage. What I mean is the repugnant taste of rotting fish that has been summoned from its resting place in the bottom of some unnameable ditch to be served on top of my pizza. If you add lots of arugula of the bitterest kind, and an abundance of some guise of bottled laxative pretending to be sauce, you will have an accurate description of the mess served to me as salmon pizza. I could write a whole treatise on how not to prepare salmon pizza, solely on the inspiration from last night's descent into the underworld. To make a long story short, I will just add the four cherry tomatoes and the one canned artichoke that, in my naivete, I had added as extra toppings for two dollars each, and you will have a complete picture of the instrument of torture served to me. As for capers, that inseparable companion to smoked salmon, the management thought I meant caps and absurdly told me they were not in that line of business. That and a bottle of a rather spiritless pinot grigio came at the reasonable cost of $91.00, plus tip. The tip, as a matter of fact, was the one thing I happily paid for, since our waiter made up for an otherwise hellish nightmare of the palate. Kudos for Mauricio, thumbs down for the place. Back at home, after long meditation I came to understand the experience had been just retribution for my going out while I should have stayed put. And put I'll stay for another year....

We were hungry for a good steak and saw this place on Google. The pictures of the food looked amazing. They offered a 36oz prime crown rib which we decided to share because 36oz of steak is generally enough for two people. It came with a cheese corn side and cipollini onion(s)$90, which is what we ordered along with an appetizer of 6 broiled oysters $18. The oysters were what we expected and tasty. Then the prime rib came out and it was nicely sliced and served on a pretty wood cutting board. For $90 we were expecting a fairly large cut of prime nicely marble but not overly fatty. What we got was a prime rib on the bone ( we expected the bone) but the bone was bigger than the steak after trimming off at least 3-4 oz of fat. The cheesy corn dish was in a small (4oz?) crock and there was one (1) small cipollini onion quartered. We probably ended up with what was the equivalent of a 12oz steak. Needless to say we left still hungry. The reason I gave it two stars is because the food was perfectly cooked and our server was great. We could have gone to Texas Roadhouse twice for what we paid here and came out stuffed and I've always had great food and service. Save yourself about $75 and go to one of the chain...