Hey Bagel — Restaurant in Seattle

Hark, mortals! Gather 'round and lend thine ears to the raving pronouncements of yours truly, a wizard whose palate has been both blessed and cursed by the culinary arts! I speaketh of Hey Bagel, a humble establishment in your realm of Seattle, yet one that holds a certain… spark.

Four stars I bestow upon this purveyor of circular breadstuffs, for while they possess a commendable magic, a touch more oomph is needed to reach true legendary status.

The proprietor, one Andrew Rubinstein… ah, a name that echoes with the very history of bagel-making in this land! I recall whispers on the wind, tales of his lineage with the Rubinstein Bagels of yore. A powerful legacy indeed! Then came a time of… flux, a wandering period where this Rubinstein plied his trade as a mere "pop-up," a phantom bagel dispensary appearing and vanishing like a mischievous imp.

Even I, in my arcane pursuits, found myself drawn to his wares. My scrying orb (or, as you mundanes call it, my commute) often led me to the desolate plains of the Mercer Island Park and Ride. There, amidst the chattering masses and the fumes of your horseless carriages, I would seek out a particular black… chariot… a black Explorer, it was! Within its metallic belly lay the treasures I craved – Rubinstein's nascent bagel creations. A vital sustenance for a wizard on the go, plotting spells and occasionally misplacing his enchanted hat.

And then there is she… a vision! A being of such captivating allure that even my ancient heart (which has witnessed the rise and fall of empires and the mating rituals of griffins) skipped a beat. An employee of Hey Bagel, her beauty is a weapon, capable of stopping even the most fearsome of beasts in their tracks. But it is her smile… ah, that devious, knowing curve of her lips! It speaks volumes, hinting at realms of experience far beyond the mere spreading of cream cheese. One senses a fellow traveler on the wilder paths of existence, a connoisseur of… shall we say… unconventional delights. A knowing glance passed between us once, and in that moment, I knew she understood the deeper currents of the universe.

The bagels themselves? A solid foundation! Chewy, with a respectable crust. The fillings, while not always reaching the dizzying heights of my magical concoctions, are nonetheless satisfying. A touch more boldness, a sprinkle of the unexpected, and they could truly rival the ambrosia of the gods!

So, four stars for Hey Bagel. A promising venture with a rich history, intriguing staff, and bagels that satisfy the earthly hunger. I shall return, for even a mad wizard appreciates a reliable source of sustenance, especially when served with a side of…...

The bagels are good. They are not worth spending more than 15 minutes in line for.

The experience. We arrived at 8:15 on a cold Sunday morning and there was a 200ft line. It took 40 minutes to get in. When our order was taken there were only two types of bagels available, sesame and plain. We were allowed to wait a couple of minutes to let the new batch come out, so we eventually did have some more options. Maybe that was lucky, maybe that's normal. I'm not sure. Either way, be prepared to improvise once you're in because offerings may be limited.

The staff. The workday was one hour along and folks already seemed frazzled. The young lady taking care of us was losing her patience since I needed to make an adjustment to the order. To this point, we asked for one more salt bagel and she simply threw in the nearest one she could reach (a plain). A small thing, but it bothered me.

A note to owner and anyone planning out costs. TAX IS INCLUDED IN PRICE. This is a great thing, but nowhere could I find this mentioned on the website or menu. In our case, this would have been helpful to know in advance for placing a large order as we wanted to qualify for an Inkind promo (needed to spend at least $45 to get $15 off).

The bagels themselves were solid. They are not as good as Mount Bagel. I found the inside a little too soft and the crumb inconsistent. A couple of the bagels had big air bubbles. Also, I noticed the batch of sesame we got didn't have salt. I'm not sure if this was just a mistake or an intentional change.

I understand there are growing pains and that social media has blown this place up above all expectations. I will also not ding for the long line. It is what it is. However, I will ding for the overall negative staff experience and the admittedly somewhat underwhelming bagels. Dare I say it's overhyped? I think it is right now. But if you're reading this a year or two later and things have died down, it's...

I will start by saying I grew up in Massachusetts and my father and I routinely did trips to NYC for bagels on a Sunday. I have lived here for 11 years and have made the best of the "bagel" options available. Today I drove from Kirkland to the U District to try Hey Bagel just before evening rush hour. I went in with the idea of getting 6 bagels for myself, my boyfriend, and my roommate and 2 8oz schmear....I picked my bagels and since some had come out small the amazing employee gave me 2, they were out of 8oz smear for both my choices and gave me 4 2oz of each instead. The employees were amazing, loving, and kind. I made it back to my car in the parking lot to try some of a bagel and share with my dog(who at our usual bagel place always get half my bagel) which unfortunately she lucked out lol. I chose to try the plain as it was the freshest of the bunch(they were all fresh, but this was hot) with the raspberry curry schmear.....I had a few bites before I had to call my dad in tears that I had found an amazing bagel on the west coast( he and my stepmom from Brooklyn were here in September and shamed be for every bagel joint here)...it was the first actual bagel I'd had since moving here in 2013...soft, chewy, fluffy, and crispy...the cream cheese a culinary adventue...since I now was equipped with an extra bagel or two...and individually pack schmear(my second choice was scallion) I returned to Kirkland and shared with 4 of my friends who agreed best bagel on the West Coast, not just Seattle area. They will all be going there own in the future and this may not have happened if it wasn't for the impeccable service. I also shared on my favorite FB page for eats in the area. Thank you for bringing actual bagels here...