Bar Smoothie — Restaurant in Tempe

There are only two places in the valley that I implicitly trust to be able to cater both a wedding and a drug intervention. This is one of them. Bar Smoothie has - hands down - some of the best h*ckin' smoothies in the entire state.

The ingredients? A+. We're talking fresh-off-the-tree fruit. The best sorbet that money can buy. Probably Jif peanut butter for the Deadlift; hope that's not a deal breaker for anyone but it's name brand so it has to be good, right? Right.

The selection? A+. This place is the Smash Bros of smoothies; every flavor profile you could possibly want is here. Sour and fruity? Tart and acidic? Smooth? Everything in between? And no matter what you choose the flavor is going to be robust. I'm partial to the Loper (more smooth) and the Aztec (tart). My son loves the Wildcat (just h*ckin' good berry flavor) more than I think he loves me.

The prices? A+. Yes, I know it is a dollar more expensive than Jamba Juice. But that's okay! You're getting more delicious smoothie, it tastes way better (in my mostest humblest of opinions), and most importantly, you're supporting a thriving local business that takes care of its people and recognizes that it gets more back the more it puts in.

These are genuinely good, knowledgeable people with a superior work ethic and product....

A Dismal Experience at Smoothie Spectacle

If you’re looking for an underwhelming experience that feels as bleak as a rainy day in Bikini Bottom, look no further than Smoothie Spectacle. The ambiance? Stark and lifeless, like an abandoned coral reef. The decor is so minimal that it practically screams, “We gave up halfway through!”

The menu is a chaotic jumble, leaving me more confused than a squid trying to play the clarinet. I spent far too long deciphering the options, only to be met with disappointment when my order arrived. The smoothie itself was a textural nightmare—tasting like someone decided to blend up sawdust instead of fresh fruit. It was gritty and flavorless, a sad excuse for a beverage that made me question my life choices.

Overall, if you’re seeking a vibrant and flavorful smoothie experience, I suggest swimming in the opposite direction. Smoothie Spectacle is an experience best left to the bottom...

A small, conventional protein smoothie shop. When I walked in, I noticed a sign outside stating "Cold Brew Now Available," so naturally, I expected to be able to order a regular cold brew. I asked the soft-spoken barista if it was available in nitro, but she didn’t seem familiar with the term—that probably should have been my first clue.

I went ahead and ordered the cold brew anyway. At first, I thought I was getting a simple iced coffee when she started pouring it from a pitcher. But then, she took it to a blender and added a scoop of protein powder. The final drink was not what I expected—super chalky and not to my liking, but that might just be personal preference.

The space itself is small but clean, with two tables for customers who want to enjoy their drinks in-store. If you’re looking for a traditional cold brew, this may not be the spot, but if you’re into protein-infused coffee drinks, it could be worth...