Clock Tower Cafe — Restaurant in Lancaster

Chips are alright if you have about 6 gallons of water at hand to quench your thirst with during and after. Dry, rubbery, too hot and crispy and bubbly on the outside. Obviously cheap, frozen oven fries thrown in a deep fat fryer. Gave up half way through. Tried feeding them to the seagulls but even they couldn't stomach them.

Staff working there don't have a braincell to share between them. Asked the guy serving if they had toilets and assured him I was going to order and I wasn't just asking so that I could sneak in and use his toilets for free. He said "yeah they're round the back of the building" and took my order. Nice one... but went round the back, only to find that toilets are owned by the council and they charge to use 😂

Under normal circumstances I would say fair play to the chap for swindling me like that and buy him a pint for the effort it took, but to be honest I don't think he even knew he'd had me. I firmly believe that he was just unable to process what it was I was actually asking. Poor lad. Must be a hard life.

But anyway, yeah 👍 alright place if stale chips and a full bladder...

Ordered chips and icecream. The cafe appeared to be manned by really lovely polite young adults. Unfortunately it's a really grubby little place. As I waited 15 mins for 2 portions of chips, I took in the state of the kitchen. Old grease clung to the work stations and faded paper signs were no longer taped down securely. Fruitshoots were off brand rip offs and prices over inflated. Once the chips were ready I added my own salt and vinegar at the collection window ledge, which was covered in slopped sauces and other condiments. Would it really be THAT hard to wipe it every few orders? Chips were very poor quality and the vinegar was not the traditional chip shop vinegar. Afterwards we ordered icecream from the hatch at the side. Cookies n cream in a waffle cone. Waterery icecream with no flavour how disappointing! Won't...

Visited Clock Tower Café in Morecambe recently. The location is lovely – there’s a nice view, plenty of space to relax, and the prices are quite reasonable.

That said, a couple of things let the experience down. I ordered the fish cakes, which unexpectedly contained bacon – something not mentioned on the menu. As someone who’s pescatarian, that was a bit disappointing. I also happened to overhear some less-than-kind remarks from the kitchen about my dietary choice, which didn’t feel great.

Food-wise, the chips lacked flavour and were on the bland side, and the halloumi bites were thin and quite hard. Unfortunately I won't be revisiting this place...