Valeria Restaurant — Restaurant in Boerne

My husband and I celebrated our very first wedding anniversary this past weekend…and decided to do so in Boerne. And after a lot of research, we chose Valeria as the restaurant to celebrate our first wedding anniversary dinner. There are several nice places in Boerne, but we chose Valeria because they offered oysters, which we absolutely love. We were so excited about this dinner, and reserved our table. We even put in comments that it was our anniversary. Upon arrival, no one was at the front. After a few minutes of waiting, a young guy came up and said “Do you have a reservation?” We told him we did, and told him our names. He seated us, but said nothing more. After seating us, he got our silverware and brought us water. We told him it was our first wedding anniversary, and he didn’t say anything for a minute…and then finally said “Oh. That’s cool.” And then disappeared. A young girl came a few minutes later to take our drink orders. Nobody ever introduced themselves to us, or seemed to care that we’d chosen this spot to celebrate this big milestone in our lives. It was very disappointing. We ordered a dozen raw oysters, and the girl informed us that she didn’t believe there was enough to make a dozen. She came back awhile later to give us our drinks and let us know they did have oysters. The oysters were NOT worth the $42 we paid. They were the tiniest oysters we’ve ever had, and were only given a little bowl of cocktail sauce…and limes?? Usually, they come with lemon, horseradish, cocktail, and crackers. We order them everywhere. This was the first time they came with just cocktail sauce. We asked about other condiments or crackers - and they didn’t offer it. We used our tiny fork to scrape off the teeniest bits of oyster bites from these little oyster shells. It was at this point that we decided to leave. In the meantime - we had looked at the menu to decide on a main course. We’d looked at their menu online multiple times, and were surprised to see that the menu at the location was very different. It had far less options, and nothing stood out to us. Between the service, the disappointment of the oysters, the fact that no one seemed to care that we were celebrating an important day, and the lack of options on the menu versus what we’d seen online - we decided to leave. We paid for our drinks, oysters, and tip…and left. The ONLY reason this place gets two stars on atmosphere is because they had a wonderful live singer there who we LOVED. He was the best part of the whole experience! We won’t be back. It was just an overall disappointment and such a...

I came to Valeria with my wife and her family, seven folks in total. We were seated rather quickly, which was the only part of the evening that occurred with any level of expediency. Wait staff seemed keen to be moving around a lot but had apparently there was a cloak of invisibility over our table. After 15 minutes to review the simple and limited menu, the waitress finally came over and took our order.

Our bottle of wine came, bread never did. Garlic bread (grocery store bread with butter, garlic, and a heavy dusting of parmesan) arrived half an hour after we arrived. We consumed it swiftly as we were famished but did not know it would be our last sustenance for the next hour.

As nerves frayed and stomachs growled, we asked the waitress when food might arrive--immediately was the response. 15 minutes later two salads arrived--a house salad and the scallops insalata. Both were wilted, so over-dressed that it was nearly impossible to identify them as greens, and the scallops were approximately the temperature and texture of a dish sponge that had been run under warm water.

The next dish (out of seven ordered) came out shortly after the salads. It was the pasta fra diavolo, which would have been lovely had anyone ordered it. When we told the waitress that we had ordered the lasagna, not the fra diavolo, we were informed that there actually WAS no lasagna, so we stuck with diavolo out of desperation (it was decent for $20, but was listed on the menu for an outrageous $44).

Ten minutes after that, which is over an hour in dog minutes, the remaining dishes trickled out--an eggplant parmesan, a chicken parmesan on a bed of pasta, two shrimp Valerias, and an order of meatballs. All had been prepared nicely and then left to sit for enough time to allow the flavors to gel, then to start cooling so as to allow the fats to congeal. The fact that the shrimp dishes were listed as entrees but only included a total of five shrimps and a dollop of creamed spinach was a bit of a stretch.

Overall, besides the fact that the food was highly mediocre, the preparations were about as Italian as the players of the Spurs, the prices were ridiculous (and I live in NYC), and the service was glacially slow, it was great. The table was level, none of the seats broke, and the toilet in the bathroom flushed, so that was great.

You couldn't pay me to eat here again. Save yourself the trouble and either suffer through the equivalent garbage Italian food at Olive Garden or get some Barilla pasta and a jar of sauce to have Italian at home in a quarter of the time and a 20th...

Its Italian food! I love Italian food! We were at Walmart and hungry so we looked right across the street and seen white lights strung outside. They caught our eye. We walked in and there were no customers. It smelt Italian. We were greeted by a nice woman, she sat us in the corner, which I didn't mind. She must of seen one of my favorite movies (Dirty Dancing) cause I mentioned "corner" and she replied with "No on puts Baby in the corner". We didn't expect it to be an upscale place but it was. The wine menu was 3 times longer than the food menu. The menu had Scallops, mussels, I think one plate with chicken, and one with beef. I was looking for Spaghetti, Alfredo, Lasagna, something like that. My husband ordered water and I got a glass of wine that was $11(Holy)! When we were trying to order from the menu our server had mentioned that they did have a Lasagna in the kitchen so I jumped on that and husband picked the Chicken Parmigiana. When we were waiting for our meals; it would of been a peaceful environment but the staff were sitting in the dining area just talking away and we were the only people in there so we had to listen to whatever they were jabbering about. The food came it looked okay. The first bite of mine was pretty good but as I kept eating it I had to set aside a bunch of hamburger and it needed CHEESE. Now my husbands was alot worse. The Chicken was burnt on the flipside. Alot of noodles though. But I cant see how in the world an Italian chef would serve one if his plates that way. My phone has been out of storage space for a while now so I am not able to snap pictures of my reviews which really freakin blows and at that moment my husband was going to take a picture but his phone was out of battery 🙁! It wasn't a pleasurable experience. I was hungry so I ate what I could of the flat noodle Lasagna. Of course we did not eat the Chicken, returned it, but at the end of the visit before we were leaving the server came over with a to go package with a newly cooked chicken. My husband liked the noodles so we had gotten a to go box for them so now he could have dinner at home. When I was leaving the server stopped me and gave me a $30 gift card. That will pay for 1 plate of Lasagna. They also gave us Dessert on the house, that was good. My husband won't be going back there. There was only one good thing about the...