Sam's China Bistro — Restaurant in El Paso

A Night at Sam's China Bistro: A Culinary Misadventure in El Paso: A Review by a Hopeful Diner

When my wife and I, in dire need of a date night, decided to venture into Sam's China Bistro, little did we know we were about to star in our very own comedy of errors. The name itself should have been our first hint. Sam's? China? Bistro? In El Paso? Such a strange juxtaposition got the best of our curiosity.

Our arrival was greeted not by the warm glow of hospitality but by the eerie darkness of what appeared to be a closed establishment. Yet, the door, propped open as if by afterthought, invited us into a setting that was more curious than inviting. The innovative seating arrangement, featuring couches at every table, promised comfort but delivered an awkward experience for any diner attempting to navigate a meal at table height.

With the place nearly deserted, we anticipated VIP service, while the menu's pricing veered dangerously into "too good to be true" territory. Alas, these were just the siren calls to unwary sailors like us. My wife's selection of Mongolian beef and egg drop soup, alongside my ambitious order of dan dan noodles, hot and sour soup, and the ever-tempting crab rangoons, was placed with the optimism of the starving.

Our anticipation was met with a waiting game that would test the patience of a saint. When our banquet finally arrived all at once, all without the essential silverware, it felt less like service and more like an afterthought. The dan dan noodles were a creative interpretation featuring spaghetti and a curious brown onion gravy. My ravenous dive into my long anticipated meal was abruptly halted by a culinary booby trap, leaving me with a splinter painfully piercing into my gums, a souvenir of the night I hadn't anticipated collecting. The hot and sour soup, at least, was charmingly funky—though this funkiness held a hidden agenda that revealed itself upon my return home.

Amidst this, the ambiance was ‘enhanced’ by a symphony of static from a radio slightly off-tune, a detail that particularly serenaded my wife, adding a surreal ambiance to our dining experience. My wife's navigation skills were put to the test as we exited, maneuvering around the couch barricade like a game-show obstacle course.

Yet, amidst the chaos, the crab rangoons shone like a beacon of deliciousness, their crispy, golden exteriors holding within the promise of what could have been. Our departure from Sam's China Bistro was not with the satisfaction of a meal well had but with the laughter at an experience so bizarre it bordered on theatrical.

In the end, Sam's Chinese Bistro delivered an unforgettable date night, not for the culinary delights but for the sheer absurdity of the experience. Like a B-rated movie that's so bad that it's kinda fun, our night at Sam's was a two-star adventure that we'll chuckle about for...

I'll start by saying I have been to Sam's more than once. My friends like the portion sizes and if you like big portions this place is good for that. The food itself is sort of hit or miss. The lo mien looks a bit like they use ramen noodles when they make it (The packaged ones you can get for like .89 cents at walmart) The chicken dishes (General Tso's, Orange Chicken, and Sesame Chicken are pretty inter-changeable in terms of flavor, and the one time we ordered the Sweet and sour chicken it was in a shockingly pink sauce) The lo mien is good even with the noddles. The dumplings are pretty awful, the dough is very think and was very gummy even fried (I've tried both fried and steamed) and the filling was off putting, it was meant to be pork but was oddly colored both times, so it might have been chicken. The egg rolls are ok, except that they more closely resemble spring rolls. One good thing is that none of the food has ever upset my stomach ( I have a very sensitive one). The prices are really good. You can totally feed three people for under twenty if you go with their special. The food isn't bad, but nothing special.

On to the service, in the times that we've been the service has been very hit or miss. My latest visit was fine, all the food arrived at the same time (That miffs me when dishes arrive at various times) and our drinks were always filled promptly. The staff was friendly and our waitress was on the ball. There did seem to be more staff than was needed for the amount of people dinning. The time before however our dishes all arrived at different times, not just one, but all were staggered, and one dish was mis-delivered to three different tables and had to be repeatedly re-made so that we were leaving before the dish arrived. Our drinks were not refilled at all and I was so mad I nearly demanded a comped meal because the service had been so atrocious. Again they seemed to be over staffed and we had several different servers which may have been the problem. The time we got food for take out was also ok, except that a dish we paid for was switched for something else and half the food was cold.

All in all the food in fine, nothing outstanding but nothing blatantly awful, the service however you will be...

Had dinner at this restaurant with my family and was not impressed at all. It is filthy. Upon entering the establishment I really liked the is was not to bright and the beaded covers along tables for privacy. Once we sat and ordered I began to noticed how filthy the establishment is. Starting by the tables they are sticky. There was a table on the far right with a wash cloth on top and a mop bucket left there for the remainder of our time there not being attended by anyone. The ceiling fans were so dusty it had layers upon layers of dirt, the ceiling looked like it could collapse at any given time along with the fan. There were cracks and water damage, you can see the pockets and the stains of the ceiling panels to include black mold. And water dripping from the ceiling all over the booth behind us with a very obvious water accumulation and no employee cared to attend to it. The food is definitely over rated. Not good, at all, but what can you do when you order such a big amount of food. A female took over once we had asked for the missing dish. Our server after that only came once to check if we needed anything and that was it.

Needless to say, we will not be going back. A food inspector should definitely pay a visit to this establishment to make sure it...