Osteria Maria — Restaurant in Front Royal

In the late 80s, I lived in Germany. Although I am deeply in love with jaegerschnitzel, as a matter of variety, I also explored three different, first-generation Italian restaurants. The food was from Heaven. It was my first taste of Italian food absent the overly-sweetened American influence. 20 years later I ate authentic Italian on the Hill (an area of New York where five Italian families serve non-Americanized Italian dishes). Yet today I sit in Front Royal, Virginia, staring at a menu filled with the names of Italian dishes. This begs to ask. Is this real? Or is Virginia foolishly taunting those who would actually recognize real Italian food? I simply had to find out...

To recap: I was seated immediately. My table and chair were immaculately clean. I was waited on within 10 seconds of being seated. It was a quiet, quaint little place, with an ambiance that begs you to fall in love. And so I started with an orange San Pellegrino and a caesar salad. The salad was fresh, and the dressing as perfect as any caesar salad could be, not drowned, but yet not wanting for more.

For my entree, I went straight to the real test. Yes, the lasagna. While I command a thorough mastery of the English language, there is no language of this world that is even nearly capable of doing this lasagna justice. It is the single best I have ever tasted. Aside from returning here, I will eat no other lasagna for the rest of this earthly life. None. Ever. Only this.

The tiramisu was authentic as well, and light enough to defy gravity. This entire dining experience was Heavenly. Am I awake? Or only dreaming? Perhaps there is only one way to find out. I must come back. I will return to this place one glorious day. Oh...

Our server was great, however, everthing else was not. Starting with the wine; we chose a 2009 aglianico basilicata I do not recall all the other details of the wine though. We were brought a 2012 agliaico, that was not even on their wine list. So basically, our choice was swapped out for something similar. The explanation you ask? ....well we don't update our wine list, it's the same grape....so does that mean you're advertising a more expensive type and serving another? Honestly, I'm not sure, I didn't get the wine details. The wine we did get was delicious, but I don't know what the true price difference is. Then we get our appetizers....meatballs that look and taste extremely similar to Trader Joes meatballs. Hmm. Again I cannot confirm this but they were definitely not freshly made. Also, our caprese salad came to our table without basil, it was replaced with lettuce leaves of a similar shape to basil. Again, not what was advertised. This explanation was...we forgot it, the lettuce is added to make it more like a salad..again that's not true because a caprese salad does not have lettuce. So they added two basil leaves and gave us back our salad plate. Finally, we get our entrées and the seafood risotto I ordered is actually rice and its under cooked...it was slightly crunchy. This time, the owner refused to accept that my dish was not as they had explained. It was one of their specisls of the night. He said, that is how they make risotto and he knows the difference between rice and arborio rice....so again, met with arrogance and no apology or offer to fix any of the issues. I don't know about you...but I've seen and eaten plenty of risotto, so i too know the difference. It was awful. I would not suggest this...

Sometimes it’s just better to eat at home… If I could give this restaurant zero stars I would. My husband & I came here with our family (10 total, 8 adults, 2 infants) for my in laws 42 wedding anniversary. I had heard great things about the restaurant and was looking forward to coming here. BUT I was so unhappy/dissatisfied with my experience & the taste of the food. I ordered the Caprese salad for my starter & FOUND a BEETLE (the size of a stink bug) in my lettuce! Yes, that’s right a LARGE BEETLE. I was so disgusted. I honestly lost my appetite. I brought it to the owners attention & his response to me was, “we wash our lettuce, there’s nothing else I can do”. He shrugged his shoulders and walked away. My husband & I have eaten all over the world.. we have eaten at little tiny whole in the wall restaurants & 5 star restaurants. NEVER has this ever happened to me. I then ordered the Chicken Scallopini for my main course. The portion was so small, chicken had a layer of fat & it was greasy. The sauce looked like it came out of a gravy packet. The majority of us felt unsatisfied and hungry after our dinner. Crazy after spending $26 on a chicken dish. I truly feel like I could have gotten a better meal at a Denny’s or Bob Evans. I’m honestly not sure how their are so many positive reviews…. I had an absolutely terrible experience & I don’t ever plan on coming back here!

To the owner- FIND GOOD HELP. DO NOT DO THIS ALL BY YOURSELF. Your restaurant is suffering & will continue to suffer because you are choosing to run the restaurant, be the chef, the seating host, and waiter. I know Covid has thrown everyone for a loop, but finding a beetle in my food was unacceptable. I hope you do better. You lost...