Hogan Brothers — Restaurant in Northfield

Hogan Brothers Acoustic Cafe,

The quintessential Northfield sandwich & soup shop. A townie staple, generally fair joint, with reasonably priced fare to boot.

The proprietor of this establishment previously owned both this location and the location in Menomonie Wisconsin before selling the later many moon ago.

What to know when ordering from the Hogan Brother:

Square up with the employee who may or may not be glaring at you with the intense displeasure evident only in the eyes of one whom has taken orders from countless mumbling neerdowells, unlike yourself, since doors open.

Order loudly, not a yell mind you, but a elevated volume level double your normal speaking voice. Direct, but kind-like. This will let them know that you view them as equals, and yes you too have worked in the service industry.

If you order a sandwich with hummus, understand that mayo is substituted out for hummus, as such make sure you ask for mayo in addition to the hummus if you are a hepcat. Ya diiig?

Hot or cold you say? There is no cold sandwich, only hot or Luke-warm. Who in their right mind orders a cold sandwich from the infamous Hogan Brother...

Tip them well, because Lord knows what Monsieur Hogan Brother pays them. But don't do so with cash because let's face the 📠 machine - your wallet hasn't seen cash since the term millennial was the fresh new generation, not today's equivalent of derogatory terminology incorrectly hurled at members of the Generation Z. Which are themselves, a separate generation.

Contemplate why the tip jars are so empty, re-examine step 5. Cope with your lack of cash based economic spiritual awakening, and place an extra lint encrusted, fully ratballed dollar in the Townie jar. With both St.Olaf and Carlton suffering billion dollar endowments, let them fill their respective jars.

Receive your sandwich and inspect for combination of hummus and mayo, but do it slowly, like opening up a present from a frenemy.

Of note: there is something to be said for a mostly open kitchen. Black lights are not necessary at this establishment for meal inspection. Unless the sauce just turns out to be extra special that day. But you'll never know, mwahaha.

Grimace and grit your teeth when the realization hits you, that yes, once again... You have no mayo on your sandwich...

Contemplate the reasoning as to why no one will give you both hummus and mayo, giving your multi-decade career of ordering the same exact sandwich nearly every time, especially when you asked with such a reasonable and clear volume... And, as an equal.

Smell the delicious sauce. The secret sauce that makes this wondrous Hogan Brother sandwich come to life. Often I wonder what did the Hogan Brother sacrifice to the devil at the crossroads when he was gifted the secret to this sauce...

Contemplate complaining to the Manager about the lack of mayo, while understanding wholeheartedly that they more than likely revile both you and any request of this context. No, thou shall choose the high road.

like the Bolsheviks of old, you take what is given, ask not why it be without mayo. Instead, appreciate with your workers palette, the lack of mayonnaise and how it accentuates the hummus to a humorous degree. Glory to the workers!

Once you have done your duty, whatever you do, under no circumstances are you to clear your own table by placing your dishes in the dirty bin. If you are one of the unfortunate souls that made this faux pas, don't worry for the workers will not let you forget.

lastly; make sure to show up half an hour before close as it is at this time that the Hogan Brother makes its finest sandwich. Something indescribable comes from a sandwich made from ingredients that have been put away early due to lack of customers, only to have been taken out again for the one fashionably late exceptionally well toned in voice, connoisseur.

Follow above my steps for success, and you yourself may just find that you would rate Hogan Brothers Acoustic Cafe at a strong four out of five stars.

🎖️Glory to the...

Let me tell you about my 30 minute espresso order. Stopped in with a friend to get two espresso floats. Place was almost empty. Three tables had people and a few waiting on to-go orders. We placed our order and waited and waited and waited. I had sent a text right after ordering so I knew how long it was taking. At the 20 minute mark, I saw someone that came in after me leave with his order. So I got up and asked about the status of my order. Nobody knew anything. The lady behind the counter told a kid to make them asap. Well, asap was another 10 minute (I timed it). So it took just over 30 minutes to get two espresso floats. The floats were not good at all. More like mud floats. It’s not like they were understaffed. Had close to 10 kids talking and laughing. Having a good time at my expense. They were probably laughing about how long they were going to make me wait. Also during my wait, a group of their friends came in and started hanging out behind the counter. I’ve had full meals at sit in restaurants that went quicker than just a drink order. Sad that nobody cares.

Not sure what was up with all of the flies in there? They were flying everywhere and landing on the counter. They were all over the tables and food appliances. We were constantly waving them away. I hope we don’t get sick from some disease from the uncleanliness.

Look at some of the other one star reviews. Seems like they are always “losing” someone’s order or making them wait for the fun of it. Need “adults” there to monitor the young kids...

I’m updating my review due to my most recent experience. I understand certain limitations regarding the work force, prices, etc. The issue is that this is a college town and I saw maybe one college kid working here. The people here are great and I have no issue with other cultures; when it’s apparent that communication is a barrier and issue while trying to place an order, that’s a problem. The hurdles in communication, specifically. I don’t know if it was the lack of ability to communicate that held her from telling me that the soup I choose cost extra, the items she asked if I wanted were apparently also extra, I was not asked if I wanted a drink and from all the struggles I had already gone through, I let it go.

Now, I’m sitting here for the longest time I have ever sat and waited at this food establishment (I’m in my 30’s and went here religiously in middle school on.) and see I’m not the only one.

Not sure what specifically the issue is, but it needs to be addressed. Another experience even remotely like this and I will boycott this establishment.

Finally got my food and they forgot the toppings I was charged extra for. Management is failing this place...