Museum Ludwig — Attraction in Cologne

Art for art's sake. Witness aesthetics clubbed into dank submission and left to die a slow, painful death as it drags itself through the mud of modernism to sink into the ultimate tarpit of whatever the basement holds. Welcome to get irretrievably lost in the corridors of the twentieth century, not unlike the Apollo 11 moon landing tapes, soviet credibility, or the concept of having fresh milk delivered to your house on a daily basis. Museum Ludwig houses two hundred and sixty thousand cubic metres of air for you to breathe, contained within walls painstakingly decorated to evoke the feeling of being trapped in every waiting room you've ever visited, simultaneously. It's the kind of art where the real art does not lie in what's to be seen, but in convincing the world that what you're looking at is, in fact, priceless. Each piece begs you to marvel at the sheer audacity of it all and even before you arrive at the first Jackson Pollock, the words: “You could have done that,” ring out like a mantra in your mind. And it's true. You could have – but you didn't. You could have been extraordinary, but then you hit adulthood like a spacebar and ended up being extra ordinary instead. Tears of unfulfilled potential well in your eyes and you reach out towards the canvas in this moment of reckoning, in an unconscious attempt to go back in time, to somehow, impossibly, reconnect with your hopes and dreams – only to set off an alarm. “Nicht anfassen,” hisses the guardian of abstract expressionism, delivering the words with a trembling urgency suggesting you're that one stupid character in a horror movie who's about to get everyone killed. Thus humiliated by an unpaid intern collaborating with a long-dead millionaire con man, you descend into the subterranean underbelly of the building. A place where contemporary art hides in shame or cunning, the exhibition as a whole eerily reminiscent of your hoarder neighbour's basement. Both shelter the physical evidence of a deeply troubled psyche, both inexplicably smell of molasses, both provoke thought. Mostly: “What the [redacted] were they thinking?” The artworks themselves appear equally confused and, for lack of a more satisfactory expression, ugly as all hell. Ugly, not by conscious choice, but as the result of a desperate lack of skill drowned in an overdose of pretension. Come and see a rescue blanket. Lying on the floor. Lying on the floor like an inanimate object, its metallic sheen a silent scream against the indifferent cube of the gallery. You paid money to be here. Are you out of touch? Is it everybody else who's gone mad? Or are you caught up, perchance, in a satire played so straight-faced you’re liable to mistake it for sincerity? Viewed from whatever angle, Museum Ludwig remains a cultural Rorschach test. And for those who fail to find any meaning, they may still find salvation in the arms of the inevitable...

Let me be clear, I entered this museum with a really negative attitude - I'm afraid that I very much took the view that modern art is all a bit of a nonsense.

I spent around 3 hours at the museum and I came out a changed man. I can't explain the effect of some of the pieces on me, who can really, but I was genuinely amazed. In addition, there was a large video exhibition which was very accessible. All in all, the content was sensational and laid out in an incredibly impressive manner including some super large rooms which help you have the space to just think. The architecture of the building alone is breath taking especially the main exhibition room which is simply huge.

In terms of the basics, the location is obviously ideal given next to station and Cathedral. It was very clean. Lots of toilets and lots of lifts and escalators for this with limited mobility. Lots of space between and around each piece so everyone has the space needed to appreciate the art. The staff were extremely polite and helpful. Importantly to me there was no art-world stuffiness - the staff are relaxed, it is no problem to just sit down in a room or near a piece and spend the time required in a relaxed and comfortable manner to truly appreciate the work. It was a simply fantastic to feel so relaxed and at ease which really really enabled me to get everything I could from the art.

Oh yes, and if you are a social pariah like me and still enjoy the occasional cigarette, there is even an outdoor area within the museum to enable you to have a ciggy without having to go all the way back to the entrance. That area is a roof top terrace on the third floor with a wonderful view of the Cathedral from a perfect location for photography. The fact that they have this facility at all let alone the fact that it is such a pleasant area perhaps reflects the attitude of the museum perfectly.

Simply put : visit this museum. I hope it acts as such a game changer for you as...

Since 1994 the Friends of the Museum Ludwig have honoured each year an international artist with the ‘Wolfgang Hahn Prize’, presented during the city's art fair Art Cologne. Both the annual highlight of the Friends' activities and one of the cultural features of Cologne and the Rhineland, this purchase prize is dedicated to the memory of Wolfgang Hahn 1924–1987 chief conservator and painting restorer at Wallraf Richartz Museum / Museum Ludwig and one of Cologne's most far-sighted collectors. The budget for the prize amounts to a maximum of 100,000 euros per annum. The museum also acquires a work from each prizewinner. The building is also home to the Kölner Philharmonic. The Heinrich-Böll-Platz, a public square designed by Dani Karavan, is above the concert hall at the north-east of the building. Unfortunately, during concerts people can't walk upon the square as it creates acoustic disturbances for the concert goers below. In 2016 the museum joined forces with the Bell Art Center to organize an unofficial retrospective of Anselm Kiefer, which opened at Beijing’s Central Academy of Fine Arts. The last stop on the tour in China was to be the new Jupiter Museum of Art in Shenzhen, but a delayed museum opening caused the works to be put into storage. At this point the museum lost track of the pieces and began to search for them. In January 2020 they finally located the pieces in a warehouse in Shenzhen and attempted to retrieve the piece. They were stopped, however, by Chinese authorities. Diplomatic action has been undertaken by the German Government, the City of Koblenz, and Kiefer himself, to secure the return of the pieces, which include the monumental...