Brunchology. Brunch café & Matcha bar — Restaurant in Funchal

The place seemed nice from the outside, so we thought we'd have a cake and some coffee. That was a big mistake.

There were four of us, and we sat outside. The waitress couldn't remember or understand how we wanted our coffee or cakes. We ordered 3 espresso coffees and 1 double espresso, along with 2 cakes. She simply didn't know what to do with the information. We saw that she didn't understand, but she went inside and placed the order. She came back twice more to ask exactly how we wanted everything.

We first received the coffee (after quite a long wait), and the double espresso was exactly the same size as the regular espresso. When I pointed this out, she "explained" why this was the case... That's how it works here, that's how it is.

We then waited another 15 minutes for the two cakes, but only one of them was correct according to our order, the other was a croissant. It didn’t even look similar... The waitress, somewhat upset, took it back and after a while, she brought the correct one. They were supposed to be served warm, but that didn’t happen; both were cold. We weren't surprised anymore.

We wanted to pay, but despite there being a 6-person staff and only 5 guests, they couldn’t attend to us, so I went inside to ask to speak to the manager. The lady at the counter pointed to the other side of the street and said that the manager was the one chatting with someone and smoking.

The lady came to our table, we told her about our problems, and she lectured us about the coffee. She acknowledged the mistake with the cakes. We said we wanted to pay, and then she condescendingly offered us a 15% discount on the cakes. We didn’t feel like dealing with this anymore, so we left it.

She went inside, and we waited another 10 minutes before she was willing to come back with the bill. Her attitude was consistently very condescending. She also told us to feel free to leave our review on any platform because they have the best ratings.

The best part of the story was when, after we paid, the manager lady, in her own style, told me to return the 2 bananas. There was a fruit bowl in the restaurant from which anyone could take fruit. Of course, I gave them back to her, and I hope she’s not angry with me anymore...

We’ve been to many places around the world, but we’ve never experienced anything like this, or...

The place seemed nice from the outside, so we thought we'd have a cake and some coffee. That was a big mistake.

There were four of us, and we sat outside. The waitress couldn't remember or understand how we wanted our coffee or cakes. We ordered 3 espresso coffees and 1 double espresso, along with 2 cakes. She simply didn't know what to do with the information. We saw that she didn't understand, but she went inside and placed the order. She came back twice more to ask exactly how we wanted everything.

We first received the coffee (after quite a long wait), and the double espresso was exactly the same size as the regular espresso. When I pointed this out, she "explained" why this was the case... That's how it works here, that's how it is.

We then waited another 15 minutes for the two cakes, but only one of them was correct according to our order, the other was a croissant. It didn’t even look similar... The waitress, somewhat upset, took it back and after a while, she brought the correct one. They were supposed to be served warm, but that didn’t happen; both were cold. We weren't surprised anymore.

We wanted to pay, but despite there being a 6-person staff and only 5 guests, they couldn’t attend to us, so I went inside to ask to speak to the manager. The lady at the counter pointed to the other side of the street and said that the manager was the one chatting with someone and smoking.

The lady came to our table, we told her about our problems, and she lectured us about the coffee. She acknowledged the mistake with the cakes. We said we wanted to pay, and then she condescendingly offered us a 15% discount on the cakes. We didn’t feel like dealing with this anymore, so we left it.

She went inside, and we waited another 10 minutes before she was willing to come back with the bill. Her attitude was consistently very condescending. She also told us to feel free to leave our review on any platform because they have the best ratings.

The best part of the story was when, after we paid, the manager lady, in her own style, told me to return the 2 bananas. There was a fruit bowl in the restaurant from which anyone could take fruit. Of course, I gave them back to her, and I hope she’s not angry with me anymore...

We’ve been to many places around the world, but we’ve never experienced anything like this, or...

AMAZING. Between Lagos and Madeira, my husband and I often felt dissatisfied with the food. Most places lacked spices and general taste. Brunchology was by far the BEST meal we’ve had within the past 8 days of traveling in Portugal. We started with a liter of Sangria, which was refreshing and amazing. It put us in the perfect mood for our meal, that did not disappoint. My husband had the Shakshuka and I had the Danish Style pancake with fruit. I could not keep my fork out of my husband’s shakshuka!! It was so savory and tasty. Definitely a taste other places had been missing! The staff assured me that my meal was just as great and they were not lying. The fruit in the danish styled pancake was fresh and light. The base seemed like a yogurt/jam that was the perfect amount of sweetness. Not too much to feel unhealthy or heavy. The fruit was fresh and sweet. The seasonal fruits were banana,strawberries, blueberries, peaches with shaved coconut and topped with powdered sugar. Absolutely amazed. I added scrambled eggs and bacon to the side to give a balance of sweet and savory! The atmosphere was great for people watching and enjoying the meal outdoors. I’m sad to have had this on my last day but what a great experience to have as an ending to my time in Madeira! I couldn’t say enough about this place and the staff. They were very pleased with knowing we enjoyed our selection and were very attentive. 100/10. If I could give it more stars, I would! We didn’t get a single picture of the food. Once I took my first bite, I didn’t even think of taking pictures. Here’s a pic of my empty...