Trapeze Bar | Old Street — Restaurant in London

I visited Trapeze bar as part of the Buckt event, so had a table booked for 2 people. In line with the promotion through Buckt, it was marketed very much as a show type event…. Although I realised upon arriving at the bar it is instead a circus themed cocktail bar open all day and night, that also happens to have a bit of live circus entertainment on a Saturday night for an hour.

I’m rating this review on this updated realisation, and not upon it being a show venue (it would score lower if I reviewed it for that).

The bar was very busy (which I’m sure is great news for the owners), however it means that lots of people in the bar are stood up hovering around the floor (not at a table). Our reserved table for 2 people was by the bar, and whilst it had 2 stools, there was no way you could actually sit on them, as the bar was so busy, and people were pushing by all the time. This means despite having a table, we had to stand the whole time (this wasn’t a problem for us, but could be a problem if someone has mobility/disability needs).

The bar made reasonable espresso martinis… they’re certainly not cheap, but fairly typical for Old Street/Shoreditch area. The cocktail menu looked reasonable. The staff were fairly friendly, but the main frustration was the continual being knocked/pushed by, by the other customers going to and from the bar.

In terms of the hour of the circus entertainment, I believe that it was pretty much all performed by 2 performers…. The ringmaster (who sang, and did audience participation), and an acrobatic/burlesque dancer who did 3 dance/acrobat/fire dance performances. They were both engaging and reasonably good, but I was left underwhelmed still (against my hope/expectation)…. I was hoping for some acrobatics, contortionist, jugglers, etc…. But I guess that’s not practical in the size of this venue.

Virtually everyone there was present for an event (40th birthdays, hen parties, etc…) and they all seemed to be having a great time. I think the venue is open late, so I expect everyone was dancing until the early hours to the DJ.

We only ordered some buffalo wings, and these arrived fairly quickly…. The sauce was on the side, so you can dip it in the buffalo or bbq sauce to your taste. The wings themselves were fine, but nothing...

Booked a table here for £80 for a hen party on Saturday 29th Jan 2022. The hen was pregnant so we thought we would enjoy the entertainment and still have a good time despite not being able to drink. We turned up only to find our table had people sitting at it. The woman showing us to the table just shrugged and started to walk away!! It took me going after her to say "are you going to ask them to move?" So she eventually did. The entertainment was meant to start at 8pm. Nothing had happened by 8.10 so we thought we'd ask a member of staff. "8.20pm they said". No explanation, so we hung on a bit longer. By 9pm still nothing. We spoke to a different member of staff. He said ridiculously "please still be my friend..." 🤨 which wasn't helpful. We'd been waiting 2 hours for entertainment that never came. The hen got upset as she wasn't having a good time, as there was nowhere to even dance, and there's only so much lemonade you can drink when you can't even hear your friends to talk either. We decided to leave by 9.15pm after still no entertainment. Only to get hounded 2 metres out of the door by the bouncer as he was demanding the plastic flute back that was still full of prosecco. We said OK, he continued to be rude. Another bouncer, a woman this time, came to join in to pressurise my friend to drink faster. They were obviously desperate for this plastic flute. I said, "how about an explanation as to where the entertainment was?" I got nothing back other than "give us the plastic flute". No apology or explanation. They were so desperate for this bloody plastic flute they wouldn't even recognise how frustrated we were as customers. The bouncer then had the audacity to say "I'm offering you good customer care here" whilst shoving his hand in my face!! The pregnant hen was very upset by this point.

This place doesn't care about the customers. Or the promises they make of entertainment despite the fact that this is the only reason people actually go here.

If you want an enjoyable night, please don't go here. Or at least be ready to fight over a...

if anyone has ever seen a Coen Brothers movie, they would be familiar with the kind of farce we endured while simply trying to get a quick meal at this 'restaurant'. We were enticed by some of the specials and the proximity to our actual venue for the evening, however soon found out why the staff greatly outnumbered the patrons at a venue in the centre of east london on a Wednesday night. Without a word of a lie, with up to 7 burger specials, upon asking if we could order some burgers the waiter responded he would need to 'check with his manager' if they were serving burgers that evening. Upon finally receiving the food and drink, i almost spat out my beer as it tasted like the last time they cleaned the bar lines was when it was government mandated post black plague. A 45 minute delay for food later (and 6 inappropriate touches to my shoulder from the over eager and more than likely coked up manager) i was told unfortunately there would be a further wait as he 'dropped my food on the floor'. Miraculously, food appeared only 3 minutes later, which did not exactly inspire me with any confidence that i would not soon be making a trip to A&E.

We later walked by Trapeze on the way to the tube home and saw Henry the Hoover pointing out another bar down the road to some other possible patrons. I can only hope they actually did not enter and were spared such an affront to the culinary experience.

Just don't go here, go to a chain, get a 3 day old kebab, eat a muesli bar or go hungry and save a tenner. Literally every other option imaginable is better than walking in here and picking up a menu. Choosing to eat dinner here is the worst mistake i ever made and i am pretty sure i once hit a person with my car.

I've given this a 1/5 because i had to give it a rating, but please note that the 1/5 means how much overall time eating here has taken off my life expectancy. 20%. If you feel you can spare...