The Monarch — Restaurant in Portsmouth

We went for “bottomless” brunch at The Monarch on Saturday evening (28/1) which was due to start at 5pm and last 1.5 hours. We were a party of some 25 people so were allocated the upstairs space, which was booked in December for a 30th, so you’d expect more than one poor waitress serving us all. Wrong. This poor girl was up and down all night and was actually a credit to the place had it not been for their stupid brunch policies and other issues we faced.

Some of our party were late, but throughout the evening instead of asking the person who’d booked the event, and who’s birthday it was, what they wanted to do, when we were ready for food, etc, other members of the group were asked to make decisions. This delayed our start so we were without drinks for some time. Prosecco was brought up in coolers, but for those (like myself) who cannot drink we were offered no alternative… 40 minutes it took for me to eventually receive my mocktail.

Cocktails come in wine carafes for four to share (although that definitely makes for a small drink), chocked full with crushed ice, which created a situation I can only liken to when you try to quickly empty a bottle with the whirlpool method, as the badly shaped jugs with that amount of ice just dumps the entire cocktail on the table. We quickly saw why they left us with unsightly blue roll and spray… If you’re lucky enough to get any of your cocktail in your glass you’re not allowed to order more until you’ve drank up, and as the cocktail servings were small anyway and took time to make people were often left without drinks for some time. It feels like they entirely miss the point of bottomless, or indeed customer service in general.

A complaint was made about the delay in our start and slow service so our time slot was increased by half an hour (taking us to 7pm). Our food finally arrived, cold I might add, at 6:30pm. It was amazing really that it was cold, particularly the wraps as they looked and tasted like they’d be cast into Mount Doom and plated up. The rest of the food I can only describe as mediocre; at best.

Finally the ongoing debate about the various complaints (with who I assume was a manager) was completely unacceptable and unnecessarily dragged out. I was sat at the opposite end of one of the long tables we were allocated, but this member of staff continually objected and argued, even going to the extent of reviewing their CCTV to check how many bottles of Prosecco we’d received at the start (and brought up another and started just pouring it into random empty glasses across the 25 of us… it was so awkward and strange. It just felt like an excuse to not provide a discount). He kept going downstairs and coming back for another go over and over again. The lovely waitress, Bryony, was eventually instructed to start taking our payments whilst he continued arguing, clearly getting more and more agitated and frustrated and his only excuse for our poor evening was that they were busy. The table had been booked, and deposits paid at the beginning of December. More than enough notice to ensure adequate staffing levels?! Eventually, by around 7:45pm I’d had enough of watching him argue with the birthday girl for over an hour, so I got up, told him how wildly inappropriate his behaviour was and that we were leaving now we had paid. He backed off quickly and allowed us to then leave in peace but obviously the whole evening had already been tainted which was a shame because it’s not cheap and had been planned for some time.

I wouldn’t recommend this place, even if it was the last eatery in Portsmouth. From their poor planning, cheap food and stingy cocktails to their rude and inappropriate manager. With so much decent competition I can’t imagine this place...

We were a party of 6 who went here at the weekend for dinner and drinks. At first we were seated upstairs - which was fine but lacked atmosphere. No problem. When we ordered 2 bottles of prosecco- they were served warm. We drew the attention of the barman who simply said the glasses were warm when he took them out of the dishwasher!! However - the bottles themselves were both warm and had just been plonked in an ice bucket. The only suggestion he could come up with was he could bring us some ice cubes to put in our drinks, so we had to drink warm prosecco! Not how prosecco should be served at all and if glasses are warm they should be rinsed with cold water before serving! We ordered the hanging chicken kebab to share between 2 of us, as we were advised that the portion was big enough to share which it was as we had both had a starter. Some chicken got left behind on the serving platter so the same barman simply picked it up with his bare hands saying "my hands are clean" and dropped it on our plate!! This is absolutely appalling!! I NEVER expect my food to picked up with bare hands!! We didn't want to make a fuss after complaining about warm prosecco so we decided to remove the pieces of chicken he had touched and just didn't eat them. The chicken itself was bland and unappetising. We then moved downstairs for drinks and managed to order a cold bottle of prosecco!! The waitress seemed surprised when we asked if it would be cold and said "of course" so clearly there were some chilled bottles on the premises after all. None of the staff were wearing their masks correctly - with the exception of one waitress who had her mask in place all night. Every other member of staff had them either under their chin or hanging under their noses. On several occasions I saw the masks being pulled down to talk at close range to customers and within staff groups. One of our party forgot to put her mask on returning from the ladies and was told by the same barman who served us upstairs (who wasn't wearing his mask properly) to make sure she wore it!! Rules are rules, masks must be worn in public which is absolutely fine, we did wear them but it is easy to forget sometimes. But these rules especially apply to the staff as well so I asked him to wear his mask too.The barman's excuse - was that it kept slipping down during a long evening!! Yet, the waitress managed to wear hers all night. I also saw him repeatedly pulling the mask down to talk. I complained to the manager at the time and he passively agreed with me that the staff were not wearing their masks correctly but he didn't try and rectify the situation. Not good enough.

On a positive note: The staff were working very hard on a busy night and our barman was very friendly and helpful, but I think the staff should go on refresher training for bar-tending and food hygiene standards. The portions of food are generous and the starter I had was lovely - Thai beef salad was big enough for a main meal! The cocktails are fun and inventive and it's a great place to go for a couple of drinks. It is nicely decorated and has a good vibe but I would never recommend...

Went for a bottomless brunch. Was a Saturday evening and not that busy, but still had to wait 10 minutes to be greeted and shown our table. Another 5 minutes before the waiter came and introduced himself, then another 5 before drinks could be ordered, but we were allowed to order 2 each. Drinks were nice and tasty but so full of ice that after a few mouthfuls were empty( amoretto sours in particular), drinks were empty long before the waiteress returned( who was better than the waiter), but this time only allowed to order 1. We had a non drinker in party, and the drink supplied she was unable to drink as tasted terrible( even the waitresses said it was on tap and not nice. This still cost us £29.95. About an hour after being sat, the food was brought out, which was only ok, very dry as if it had been sat under a hot lamp. The final round of drinks was ordered, and then the bill time, so £187.50 total for 5( Inc 1 non drinker), which we were overcharged for. They did refund me cash to make up for the mistake. Now, a couple of health & safety issues i noticed. The fire alarm had been activated but not reset. It was still in the same state on leaving. Also, the men's toilet door does not have a handle on the inside to get out. Luckily, it didn't close fully. Fancy being stuck in a basement loo then visit here. There is no real atmosphere as well. Only visited as I had never been before but wished I had gone...