Sun Bright Hotel — Hotel in New York

Ok, let's start from the positives- it's cheap and very central- downtown Manhattan right between Chinatown and what's left of Little Italy. Subway stations are just a few minutes' walk away too. Sounds good, right? Wrong!

The first warning sign was when I opened the door and found myself facing a long flight of stairs with no lift or anybody to help me carry my luggage upstairs. In hindsight, should have turned around and searched for a hostel in the vicinity. Yet it was freezing outside so I decided to lump it. The reception area wasn't so bad and from what I could see of the first floor, it seemed like a decent place to stay. The Asian gangster-looking guy at the receptionist said that they adopt a no-refund policy. Second warning sign. The door that opened onto two flights of stairs that led to the second and third floors had a sign saying 'No Women Allowed' stuck onto it. Third warning sign.

I had booked a room on the third floor. The rooms are NOT rooms. There are rows of tiny cubicles, without windows and without roofs! Instead of roofs, they have barbed wire which adds to the prison experience. Obviously, that means you can hear everything that is said in neighbouring rooms. For emphasis, the rooms are TINY. It's just an uncomfortable bed fastened to one side of the cubicle, a socket at the foot of the bed, and a dustbin on the floor. Wi-fi only works occasionally too. The only mercy was that there was enough room under the bed to fit my suitcase.

The bathrooms are fine on the first floor but they're disgusting on on the third one. I'm talking cockroaches scuttling across the sink, flushing not working and dirty shower walls.

And the second floor looked even worse. The walls were filthy, the cubicle wires extended to the top of the roof and a putrid stench emerged from it everytime I had to pass it to make my way up or down the stairs. In the end, I actually had to avert my eyes from the second floor because I felt so disgusted that they were housing actual human beings inside it.

There is another positive, I suppose: The place is so horrendous that it forces you out onto the streets of New York. I wouldn't recommend this place to my worst enemy though, a hostel's a MUCH...

I didn't have to count sheep to go to sleep at night - I just counted the roaches. You know, in between not letting the ones as long as my middle finger crawl all over me. The staff was INCREDIBLY rude and did not inform us that it was opposite-time-day - you know, the one day every week in which you do the things you'd do during the work day in the wee hours of the morning instead - like, for example CONSTRUCTION WORK.

I could have overlooked those things though, if only the staff hadn't insisted on the Gregorian chants at the crack of dawn. Normally that type of music is lovely, early morning or no, but some of the content was concerning. My Latin from highschool is a little rusty, but I'm pretty sure there was something about sacrificing nubile maidens to Lucifer, high lord of hell? We're pretty devout worshipers of our lord and master Ba'al, Warden of the East, so it was very off-putting when they passed around that bejewelled goat's skull to collect a tithe in. So flashy! What happened to good old fashioned blood covered animal's remains? But I guess all the businesses nowadays have tried to go "modern" to stay "hip" with the younger crowd. Perfectly good waste of bodily fluids. Which brings me back to my review - the bed? Not nearly enough semen stains when we turned off the overhead light and used a wand to check. There was a particularly large one we almost got excited about, but the pattern was too much like urine for us to be convinced. If you're going to give me the authentic creepy hotel with bad service package, you've GOT to go with semen. Don't even get me started on whether it was left by orgy all at once, or over time. We SPECIFICALLY requested an orgy room, but some of the stains looked suspiciously older than others. I guess you get what you pay for.

New York City itself? A gem. This hotel? Skip it. Spend a little more and stay somewhere with actual customer service and less "roommates". (The roaches. I'm referring to...

I stayed here for about seven nights. The single most important factor affecting your experience here is managing your expectations. I had read all the reviews online, so when I showed up here I was expecting the worst. I was pleasantly surprised.

I stayed on the fifth floor. It's true that the other two floors (3rd and 4th?) look terribly like crack-dens. No matter though as I don't think those get rented out anyway. So, let's review quickly: WiFi works and works surprisingly well (~20mbps). Rooms are small as you'd expect, but it's enough space to fit a small duffelbag. There's also a hangar for you to hang clothes, etc. You're provided with a towel/toothbrush/paste, etc. The beds/mattresses are also surprisingly comfortable. The wood underneath might creak a bit but that didn't take away from the comfort. HOWEVER, if you're a bit on the taller/heavier side, you might have a hard time sleeping here, as the beds are a bit short and narrow. Bathrooms? It's true that they can sometimes be a bit dirty with a towel on the floor, etc., but luckily there are about five bathrooms on the fifth floor. I never had to wait to use one. What's the worst thing about staying here? THE NOISE. Bring ear plugs. You will literally hear everything that's going on. You'll hear conversations, yawning, burping, farting, etc. It'll be almost impossible to sleep without ear plugs. An eye mask will also help a ton. Some other guests are quiet and keep to themselves, but there's always that one douchebag making a whole bunch of noise who also doesn't understand English. Smell? Honestly the only thing I ever smelt was a bleachy/clorox smell when they were doing cleaning.

Long story short, I'm reminded of something I read in another review, which asked, are you a traveler or a princess? Like I said, it's about managing expectations. And at the end of the day the only thing that matters is this - would I stay here again to save money? I would. But you might have a different...