Misbah Indian Cuisine — Restaurant in San Bartolomé de Tirajana

I don't usually write reviews unless I come across something astoundingly good or bad and having lived in England for over 14 years, I have had my fair share of really poor food at restaurants masquerading as 'Indian' but Misbah Indian Tandoori in Maspalomas, Gran Canaria truly gets the crown for serving some of the worst I have had the misfortune to subject my palate to.

Question: How do you mess up Butter Chicken or something as simple as a Chana Masala or even more elementary Aaloo Gobhi. Answer: Make a uniform gravy with loads of sugar, red colour and some basic spices; all swimming in a quart of dark oil and toss in whatever you want, call the concoction a dish and serve it to make all the senses scream in unison.

But then when you are sitting next to the beach with your holiday DNA activated, a warm Atlantic breeze wafting through the hair and the sound of waves gently lapping the shore, you play the charade and call the food 'Indian' and even smile and say thank you. After all there is always a pint of chilled beer to wash the inedible offering with. The restaurateur also plays the charade, they smile even though they know how unpleasant their food is but they know it's the holiday trade they cater to, so why bother. They are not going to see the same tourist...

Ordered poppadoms. They only come in 2s for €4. First lot came and were dropped on the floor. Server came back with another 2 but the bottom one was smashed so it was clear they just picked up the one off the floor and put it back in the tray. Had another brought out to me when queried.

The drink prices are okay but the mains, (curries) are around €15 each. They are brought out in the smallest dishes I had ever seen for a curry. Think a soup bowl for minors. Honestly... I weigh about 13 stone and this wasn't even close to being enough for me, not compared what you would get back in the UK for half the price.

I had Chicken Tikka Masala but it had no real taste, was quite watery and only contained 4 pieces of chicken.

All in all €45 for 2 drinks, a rice, 2 mains, poppadoms and a garlic bread.

I would probably recommend having a starter and ordering chips with additional rice for the meal to fill you up or you'll leave feeling short changed.

Oh and being realistic, I know things are bound to be more expensive near the front and near the hotels (rent, tourism etc).. Also the fact that food is served and cooked differently in other countries to the UK that we're used to but the portion size compared to the cost would deter me from returning ...

All in all it was not a pleasant experience. My boyfriend was looking for a special dish. While explaining what he was looking for the waiter got a call and went away. The next waiter did not listen at all and just commented that we are not in Germany. He then recommended a dish that was ok but really had nothing in common with what my boyfriend was searching for. I had the butter chicken. The rice needed to be ordered separately for my dish. It was almost 5€ for two to three spoons of rice. We both went away hungry and we both were not pleased with the taste and the amount of the food, especially in relation to the price.

I also had a cocktail (cosmopolitan) and it tasted extremely sweet, what is uncommon for a cosmo. It also tasted as if it was a virgin drink what is also uncommon for a cosmo. Normally it is a rather strong cocktail. They made me a new one after I kindly asked for them to do so. The second cosmo at least had lime juice in it but did not taste any better.

Finally I gave my card to the waiter to pay and he requested the PIN number from my boyfriend. I found that to be very strange, as if I would not be able to pay even though I was the one to handed over my card. I felt...