The Top Secret Comedy Club — Restaurant in London

An interesting one. I really enjoy these shows, the comics are great, the show is well put together and it's just generally a great night out. But there's a big problem...

The free/£1 entry Monday nights are advertised as a "cheap and accessable comedy show for all" however at the end of the show you get harassed and guilt tripped into donating some quite substantial amounts. There's nothing wrong with asking for donations but it is incredibly uncomfortably pushed, and for a show that's advertised as being financially accessable, this clearly isn't the case. If someone was to go to the show with low income expecting to have found a lucky cheap night out, and suddenly being almost forcibly pushed into a £10 (or more)donation at the end, then that is so unfair beyond comprehension. What's more, is that at one of these shows they had a promotion on (probably do it every time) saying "pay £20 and get a membership card, great, on the card it clearly states "free entry to Monday night shows" along with a load of other benefits and discounts... However it's not free is it top secret... Again I go to a Monday night show and on the way out I am begged to donate even after showing my card by some smirky looking prick. No. You're not taking my money if you've told me I've bought this card and it gives me free entry...

Today I found out they've now added a "priority ticket" for those who don't feel comfortable to be asked for donations at the end... Sorry, what? £20??? So let's take a look at this, the people who are most likely to not feel comfortable to be asked for donations are those that can't afford it, yet you're trying to force a premium of £20 to avoid their anxiety? I also question how they even know who's got one of these priority tickets at the end given that I with a membership card was still tried to be forced to donate...

Unfortunately I don't think I can support this club any more which is such a shame because they really truly do put on a good fun night, but until they change their business practices, I cannot support them any more. Just put a regular ticket price stop being dishonest, £10 a head is absolutely a reasonable price for the show you put on on Mondays and everyone would be happy to pay for that. Stop acting sly and playing the donation card, it's really quite pathetic and unfair on the public and will lose trust.

Edit: after writing this review I had a suggestion which I hope is taken onboard. You want donations for the show, so instead of a flat fee priority ticket, make it a donation ticket. Donate online before the show to get a priority, that way you're still getting your donations, and people with anxiety about being coerced at the end don't have that worry any more. Win win. Take this on and I will gladly come back and...

It should be noted that the club games Google reviews by offering free shots for 5* reviews—the English love a free shot, hence the thousands of 5* reviews.

EDIT: the owner is a liar. Perhaps they’ve stopped bribing for good reviews, but they’ve done it many times when I’ve been.

I’ve been to top secret many times in the last year, and seen a few good comedians for every 10 duds. I also discovered the best comedian I’ve seen for years here. There are usually 4-6 comedians per show, so I’ve never left wishing I hadn’t bothered.

In general, you get what you pay for. Floors are sticky, toilets pissy, no seat reservations so you can’t guarantee being able to sit with your friends when returning from a break. Unless you fit into a Victoria’s Secret night gown, the seats won’t be too comfortable. But the tickets and drinks are cheap, which makes the rest tolerable. The staff always seem pleasant too.

However, many shows have tickets sold for £1. They then collect “donations” at the door at the end of the night. This means a very long wait to exit, which they don’t warn you about. They’ve also been soliciting “donations” more and more aggressively recently.

Last night, the MC told the audience that leaving without “donating” is akin to theft, and that “you wouldn’t leave a restaurant without paying”. I’m not so sure. If a restaurant charged 1200% more than the price listed on the menu, I may well leave without paying. That’s a dishonest business model. My friend and I left £25 as usual, on top of the £2 ticket price. I almost reconsidered when I saw the same MC holding the bucket shouting abuse at someone for not paying the “donation” as he left. If the tickets cost £12, charge £12. If the tickets cost £20, charge £20. Listing one price and charging another may be a profitable way for them to run their business, but it isn’t honest. It isn’t made clear at all that this is how they collect their payment. I realised when I saw the comedians at the exit that I should have payed them directly and cut...

Despite all the negative reviews over the last few months about the 5 minute awkward rant at the end of the show in which you are guilted into donating at least £15-£20, the host hasn't learned and continues to do it. You will be called rude and compared to "dine and dash" at a restaurant if you don't?? I don't think most people go to a restaurant under the impression they will be making an optional donation at the end.

They then block the way out until you pay... I was invited last minute after work by a friend and thought it would be fun to pop in for a mn almost free show. The actual price is £20 unless you want to be publicly shamed. What a bizarre way to run an event. Comics were good, but it's made clear most are testing material for bigger events to come... apparently, that's not enough incentive though so you have to pay to be their guinea-pig.

Seen loads of £1-£5 theatre shows through various promotions in London and never been blocked from leaving to "donate" before.

Edit: response to owner

You obviously have an ego issue with these type of reviews of your events. As proved by counting my previous 1 star reviews. I think you noted 18? and I feel it's important for people not to be ripped off, mislead or accused of stealing for attending a "free" event. I have almost 100 reviews on my account so the % of good events and resturants I go to is still high.

Your point scoring regarding your "dine and dash" comparison also makes no sense as a Tip is percentage based on what you spend on the meal and the quailty of service. Dine and dash as you accuse people of is the equivalent of stealing the meal... not the servers' tip.

Your response has definitely convinced me not...