Starbucks — Restaurant in Bossier City

⭐☆☆☆☆ — A Heroic Tale of Caffeine, Time Travel, and Existential Regret

Ah, Starbucks. A global empire of overpriced brown water and hope. But this Starbucks? Oh no, dear reader — this one is special. This is the Starbucks Drive-Thru of Infinite Suffering™️, located conveniently in a dimension where time stands still and your patience goes to die.

Let's start with the drive-thru line. I pulled in optimistically, thinking I'd grab a quick iced coffee. That was in April of last year. Since then, I’ve seen seasons change, my beard grow long and wise, and my Spotify Wrapped turn over — twice.

I did the math: it would actually be faster to fly to South America, find a plot of land in Colombia, plant my own coffee beans, raise them like beloved children, harvest and roast them, smuggle them through customs, enroll in a 6-week online course titled “Barista Basics: Foam Art for the Emotionally Numb”, and finally brew my own damn coffee at home — all before this line moves TWO cars forward.

To add historical perspective, this Starbucks opened its doors on December 11, 2006. Since then, FIVE different presidents have taken office. That’s more U.S. Commanders-in-Chief than the number of Toyota Camrys that have successfully exited this drive-thru since it opened. Somewhere inside, a single barista is still making a Caramel Macchiato from 2014.

In fact, I think I saw a guy in line ahead of me slowly turning into sediment.

The staff? Bless them. They're lovely. But I suspect they were cursed by a coffee witch long ago to brew each cup using only the tears of time travelers and the distant memory of espresso.

If you like long waits, spiritual awakenings in your Honda Civic, and questioning your life choices somewhere between the speaker box and the pick-up window, this...

I've been to this one multiple time but never before have I had such a bad experience! I work in customer service and this was absolutely the worst I've ever experienced in my lifetime and I used to work at a burger King that got robbed! The service was trash and the Baristas have it coming to them. All of them. They didn't even want to give the time of day when I entered as if they didn't want to work there. Look I don't expect you to love your job but you have to acknowledge the customer and serve them. That's what you're there to do. The last time I went to this Starbucks will be the LAST time I go to that Starbucks ever! When I finally received my drink, it was completely wrong. They thought my name was Trevor, like first off I have a nametag! How do you screw that up! And I know it was mine because there wasn't anyone else in the store! Absolutely would never come back here. I hope the store closes forever just so we don't have to deal with this abomination of a Starbucks. A true travesty to coffee enjoyers everywhere. The only good thing about my experience was a barista named Madison. She actually made it worthwhile. If it wasn't for her then I would have left the store immediately. She actually took my order after it was taken wrong, like she stepped in out of nowhere and made sure my order was done properly. She remade it herself as if she did it wrong to begin with but she wasn't even the one that took my order! Soo very good on her. That's the type of service I want in life. She went above and beyond what I was expecting. The rest of the store would fall apart if it...

New store manager is a poor addition to this store. I have been going here for nearly 2 years now, almost every day. I have spent well over $1,000 at this store alone. When I stay for extended periods I tend to get meals from nearby places (Subway, chic fil a, etc) early on. For the past 18+ months this has been fine since I still buy drinks and such later in the day. I had done the same this day as well. Well after I finished eating (around 30 minutes or so) He comes up to me saying they don't allow outside food and drinks. I say I've been coming here for the past year and a half but fine, I wont do it again. His response to this was to call me a liar and walk off. 5 minutes later he comes back and says I am disrespecting his store by bringing food/drinks in. I ask if he wants me to leave and he just stares at me with a stern, angry face and walks away.

Safe to say I will NOT be going to this store while he remains there. Nor any store he goes to if his idea of rewarding customer loyalty is to harass and intimidate...