Food: Excellent. Environment: Casual, comfortable. Indoor and outdoor tables.

I followed the Seattle Storm to Everett for the game on my birthday last Tuesday, and included Cafe Wylde in those plans after noticing it’s close enough to the bus stop and the Arena.

Here’s what the menu said then and still says today (Sunday) about the two items I purchased: —“Strawberry Balsamic (Smoothie) – Strawberries, banana, coconut cream, rustic balsamic from Modena Italy, sweet vanilla bean.” —“BBQ Jackfruit Sandwich (Entree) – Sweet, spicy, and seriously filling like a traditional BBQ sandwich should be. Ciabatta bun (this is not G/F), BBQ filling, arugula, red onion, avocado. Side of fresh house-made slaw.”

This is a vegan restaurant, but I’m not ashamed to admit that I went there with animalistic intentions on that sandwich – the kind of animal who has wanted for a long time to try jackfruit, who has liked barbecue for even longer, but who had never before imagined any sort of reconciliation between the two – a hungry, bewildered animal: a bewildebeest. I hadn’t yet settled on which of my Top 3 Most Intriguing Cafe Wylde Fresh(ly) Blended Juices would capture #1 on that early-June evening and subsequently slide into my BMs: Black Lemonade, Schizandra Lemonade, or The Roslyn. ...but (whoa) then (hey) I got distracted by the (what’s this) Strawberry Balsamic(...?) and now...

It’s my turn to order, and I’m lost between the sections of QR code menu on my phone.

Panicking, I verbalized the REAL issue, here: “Wow, that Strawberry Balsamic sounds really good...” The on-duty Smooth Operator says it was her new favorite, so I responded with a few enthusiastic words of affirmation, before quickly clarifying, “Is that a juice?”

She.

Said.

Yes!

There’s NO WAY she could have known how important that question was to me! We’d simply been making brief but still-awkward small talk about tattoos, and...

That smoothie-juice distinction actually wasn’t very important; I simply thought a “juice” would go better with dinner then a “smoothie”.

The Strawberry Balsamic reminded me of someone I used to know called “Orange Julius” in his strawberry-banana mode, but MUCH broader depth of flavor, with a finer blend.

For vegan protein substitutions, texture is often the biggest hurdle. The jackfruit’s fibrous nature helps achieve the pulled-porky-ness of this excellent sandwich’s filling. I’m still looking forward to exploring jackfruit on its own terms, but Cafe Wylde does an exceptional job of finding the appropriate flavors from the vegan ingredients to achieve the expected barbecue sandwich experience. It is, in fact, sweet, spicy, and seriously filling like a traditional barbecue sandwich should be. The arugula and red onion provide additional crispness and flavor. (Between the ciabatta, BBQ filling, and avocado, I’m sure they’d execute a killer torta sandwich, too.) The side of slaw is a perfect, lite addition – a bit sweet with a touch of horseradish.

Based on my assumptions of its self-identification, I had been bracing for a rowdy time, but actually had one of my more peaceful, delightful meals at Cafe Wylde.

Negatives: -Some of the menu items can seem pricey. Running a small business is expensive, and good ingredients cost more money. Investing dollars close to home helps the community more broadly (minus no points); -The Seattle Storm basketball tickets were kind of expensive (minus one point); -At Angel of the Winds Arena, Seattle Storm merch wasn’t yet available that early in the season (Needed a new hat; minus one point); -Everett’s nearby mountains are all up in my business; Seattleites like our foothills to give us personal space (minus one point for mountainous cascade of oppression); -This 5-star rating system isn’t as good as my usual 10-point system (minus two points).

I’ll be at Cafe Wylde later today for visit 2. All I’m sure about is a Juice, the Smokey Avocado Dip, and a slice of cheesecake; either the Pesto Pasta or Bukhan Bowl will also likely make an appearance.

Highly recommended!