Kirby's Steakhouse — Restaurant in The Woodlands

Maybe at some point I will be inspired to return but it may take awhile. Generally, I do not write comments about my experiences in restaurants. If I have a marginal experience, then typically, I don't return. I have choices and will spend my money elsewhere. I do believe, however, this review will represent those of us who are true foodies; those dedicated to the heart of the matter when it comes down to a great experience and great food! This review is for my foodie folks who have decided to spend hard earned dollars where they are appreciated.

My family and I LOVE great restaurants so coming from the Nation's Capital (DC) where restaurants are plentiful, the service impeccable and food AMAZING provides our family with a barometer to measure cuisine. At Kirby's, quite frankly, I am uncertain whether or not this review should qualify as a rating. I suppose the one (2) star rating is a complimentary pass so we will give them A for effort.

We landed at Kirby's with a complimentary gift card in hand. To add to the excitement, it was my son's birthday gift and he was certain about his choice to dine there. I was not excited, had never been to this restaurant, but received decent feedback about it so I decided to join in with anticipation. The ambiance was great and the service personable. My son ordered a steak, my dad - Sea Bass whom he shared with my mom and I ordered lobster bisque soup (yummy) accompanied by a Caesar Salad topped with grilled Shrimp. However, when the food landed on our table, I was dumbfounded. My son did not finish his $50 dollar steak, The fish tasted old, and my salad: omg... the lettuce looked like it was left over from a few days prior only to land sloppily onto my plate. I wish I had taken a picture. I was in complete disbelief. NO exaggeration.

To add insult to injury, we were asked on several occasions about our dining experience, and with a polite retort, we verbalized that it was fine..Not really. Perhaps the Waite staff thought it was comical to watch their patrons cringe at the sight of it all because they have been getting away with it for so long. At this point, they should feel EXTREMELY embarrassed by this feedback. Honestly.

For the record, I don't return food. Once it has been landed on my table, I will either eat it or lay my fork down, but who wants to return the food thinking there will be a change in disposition/attitude when initially it should have been prepared with love and appreciation?

Suffice to say, the ambiance vs. the FOOD is not a match. Regardless of WHO YOU ARE SERVING, the food should represent! I called the management to advise them about my experience. They called back, but I did not bother to follow up.

To date, my parents took a chance and went back AGAIN to give this establishment another chance 8.20.19 due to a special occasion - treating their friends who were celebrating their 27th anniversary. Sadly, the experience was an epic failure.

Level Up: Recommendations to your Woodlands Restaurant and to Kirby's executive staff: please adhere to what is being said here. Please make sure if an entree has been returned, then your management staff checks on their patron(s). And LEVEL UP! For the amount spent to support it, the gesture will only benefit the etiquette. Please, LEVEL UP and DO BETTER! Thank you for being open to constructive criticism....

We wouldn't have even thought of dining at such a pricey establishment, but we won a $50 gift card (figured that another $50 would cover our dinner). We've been fortunate enough to experience other such places (on someone else's dime, thankfully), so we do at least have a reference point.

Our reservations were for 5:00 (opening time). We arrived at 4:55, with all staff in place, and still had to actually wait the five minutes until we were finally seated in a totally empty dining room. As for ambience, the place was dimly lighted, with virtually everything (including walls, linens and upholstery) black or close to it. A bit of color (perhaps burgundy tablecloths) would have brightened the atmosphere, without detracting from the luxury surroundings. But we came to eat, so here goes ...

The sourdough bread was great, served warm with an enticing aroma. But that turned out to be the highlight of the meal. At $$$$+ prices, we expected our salads to be other than almost exclusively iceberg lettuce. The bleu cheese dressing was similar to what we have at home in a bottle. The soup du jour was listed as "loaded baked potato," one of our favorites. We imagined a bowl filled with chunks of spud, pieces of bacon, shredded cheese, green onions, etc. What was served was basically a puree ... nothing floating anywhere. The version we buy at Costco is truly loaded with all the goodies in their original forms. We much prefer it.

But the star of the show at Kirby's is the steak. We were easily able to split the 18 oz. ribeye. We ordered it medium rare ... came out closer to medium, but not a major issue. However, it was not as tender as we've had at other places charging nowhere near the $52 price tag ... and was the seasoning ever salty! My wife remarked that we've cooked tastier and more tender ribeyes on our grill. We also ordered the brussels sprouts side (at an additional $12), nicely served and quite tasty.

We're not in the habit of spending well over $100 for dinner. Our experience at Kirby's didn't change...

Kirby’s steakhouse HH in the bar is the best! The service from Alison and others which in the past has also included Justin and always includes greetings from the kitchen…Clarence and staff are the absolute best at getting the best flavors out of the featured items! The dirty martinis with mixed plain and blue cheese olives is my “go-to” yet my SIL had a sweet cranberry one that wow if you like a martini with a splash of cranberry then go for it. We were celebrating my 45th bday and Kirby’s didn’t disappoint! We started with the stuffed shrimp (bar menu) and mostly eaten in the pic because I forgot to take a pic b4hand with this amazing b something sauce (kinda lemony wine cream) yum! Then fried pickles with yet another yummy sauce. And of course the tender grilled lamb chops (HH menu) (yup you got it another amazing sauce), baked herb Boursin cheese (HH menu-fresh roasted garlic cloves - only order on a 2nd date or up or you may turn your date away with your breath haha) delicious! Soy sauced sliced beef (bar menu) I think with a chimachuri sauce that’s great; meat so tender and buttery! Steakhouse sliders (bar menu but had ordered the French dip sliders but didn’t disappoint) very flavorful and fries cooked perfectly as well as raw oysters where I mixed the cocktail with the pesto EVOO or whatever with extra horseradish that again was Amazing! And fresh bread with plenty of butter to soak up any of the sauces mentioned above just because they were all so good! Ending with the bourbon pecan pie with a great flavored ice cream that we all shared a bite (or 2!). The lighting at first was dark yet naturally lit since the sun was still up at 5 but by the time we left around 6:30pm it was darker, it could have been lighter but I guess if we had kept our candlesa d not “shoo’d them away it would have been lighter) but we ordered so much food for our party of 6 we needed the table room. However still a 5...