Five Guys — Restaurant in Greeley

Five Guys: The $100 Fast-Food Fantasy Nobody Asked For Let’s talk about Five Guys, the burger chain that looked at inflation and said, “Hold my peanut oil.”

The Burger:

$12 for a bacon cheeseburger. That’s not a combo. That’s just the burger. No fries. No drink. No apology.

Sure, it’s “fresh, never frozen.” So is heartbreak. You get a pile of toppings that make it look like a salad bar exploded in your wrapper. But hey — at least you can customize your regret.

The Fries:

$7 for a large fry. Hand-cut, cooked in peanut oil, and dumped into a paper bag like they’re ashamed of themselves. You’ll get enough to feed a small militia, but only if that militia enjoys soggy, salt-drenched disappointment.

The Drink:

$3.50 for a large soda. That’s right — $3.50 for carbonated sugar water. No refills unless you want to do the walk of shame back to the machine.

The Math:

One person: $25 after tax.

Family of four: $100 for lunch.

For fast food.

In a paper bag.

With no table service.

No combo deals.

No kids’ menu.

No mercy.

The Vibe:

Five Guys is the Tesla of fast food — overpriced, overhyped, and defended by people who think peanut oil is a personality trait.

You’re not buying a burger. You’re buying into a narrative: handcrafted, artisanal, made-to-order mediocrity.

Verdict:

If you enjoy paying steakhouse prices for cafeteria ambiance, Five Guys is your jam. But if you have a mortgage, a family, or a functioning calculator, run. Run like your wallet depends on it —...

I picked up our food, got home realized they messed up my wife's order. She can't eat it because of food allergies. Called and talked to the manager Maddison, she really didn't care what we had to say and her mentality was that this was our problem and treaded us so. If this is how management treats customer, I believer there might be more underlining issue and I don't feel confortable eating there. I ended up throwing my food away because its not fair for me to eat in front of my wife. Needless to say, Maddison ruined our night because of their "opps". Things would have been different if they offered to recook her food or just maybe have been a little apologetic.

Update I spoke to the general manager and he refunded the whole order and game me a free meal, I went back two days later and Nathan helped me. when I asked for a lettuce wrapped burger, he immediately asked if it was for an allergy. He was really professional and helpful even though he had NO clue about the experience I had two days prior. after that visit, I will be return except when Madison is working.. those days we will...

I placed an order online so it could be ready when I got there. When I arrived at the restaurant I informed them I was there, and the employee let me know it was almost ready. I watched them finish my burger and hot dog, and that’s when the fun began. I watch customer after customer come in after me, and leave before me. Was told they were waiting on fries. I watched more fries come up, and then watched them be given to customers who came after me. I then asked the manager on duty why everyone else was getting there food before me, and his response was that I was not door dash, and then he ignored me. So apparently, my money and business isn’t as important as door dash. When I finally did get my food, my fries were fresh, but the rest was cold. I order a lot, and I can understand them being behind, and I can be patient. But when I watch customer after customer leave before me while coming in after me, that just is t right. I probably...