Duck Tours South Beach — Local services in Miami Beach

I can't articulate strongly enough how rude the Duck Tours South Beach employee was at their James Avenue check-in location. He was extremely short with me when I asked for directions on where to go (the bus picks you up around the corner). We went around the corner and saw nothing, so I ran back to the check-in office to ask him what I was looking for. His exact verbatim response in a snotty tone of voice was, "It's a duck boat tour, what do you THINK you're looking for?!" I had to be the one to stay calm, and I explained I wasn't sure what I was looking for. He just said "It's right around the corner" and I had to ask what store it is in front of or is there any landmark I can look for. Turns out there is 1 very small white street sign saying "Duck Tours South Beach," but no big signage or storefront banner around the corner where you're supposed to wait for the bus to arrive. Additionally, we paid a $12 deposit for each adult in our 4-party group. Upon arriving to pay the balance in person for our tickets we learned there is actually a senior citizen discount and asked if we could get 2 discounted seniors and 2 regular priced adults, instead of buying 4 full-priced adult tickets. The rude employee said no, that couldn't be done so we had to over-pay for 4 full-priced adults. We were the only ones in the office at the time so he was not busy or anything. Besides thinking, "C'mon, we're with 2 sweet old grandmas here you really can't find a way to type a few keys into computer/cash register and let them get the senior citizen rate?" the main thing that was disappointing was how rude the guy was when he said "no." He lacked even the common sense to say, "Oh, sorry for the inconvenience" or anything, just acted as though I was bothering him for even asking if our seniors could get the posted senior citizen discount. I totally understand people have bad days and I know I sometimes have things going on in my personal life that impact my mood so I gave the employee grace when he was so rude initially. But when I ran back to ask for help finding where we were supposed to go and he again snapped at me in such a rude way, treating me as if I was an idiot by saying "What do you THINK you're looking for?!" instead of just answering a simple, innocent question, it really blew my mind and prompted me to write this review. Unrelated and thru nobody's fault, the speaker system on the duck boat tour gave out and stopped working 10 minutes into our 90-minute tour so was hard to hear the tour guide. That said, our tour guide Sam was GREAT, very entertaining and really worked hard to yell to be heard. We tipped him well to thank him for his efforts. We did enjoy the sights we saw once the tour began. Our tour started 22 minutes late, but I'd give them grace on that as the group before us had special needs adults who took a long time to de-board ... you have to go down a ladder backwards to get off the bus. You could tell the group ahead of us had a great time and I was glad for that. But just be forewarned that depending on the group ahead of you, and given you have to de-board down a ladder, I'd imagine tours might start late from time to time (i.e. I doubt ours was the only tour that started late given the design of the ladder). An incredible amount of rudeness by the staff and a couple different logistic issues ... certainly more negatives than you'd expect for a 90-minute duck boat tour that costs $180 plus tax for 4 adults. I hope this review is...

Smoky engine

I went on this Duck Tour On Christmas Eve. It was my second date with a stunningly beautiful woman, let’s call her J, so I could’ve really used a good Duck Tour to keep everyone entertained. In a cruel case of foreshadowing, on the first date with J, we saw a tour bus overheat and blow steam out of its side. On the date of the Duck tour, J was caught in terrible traffic and we were almost late; lucky for us the tour was delayed by half an hour, which was convenient; or so we thought. On the way over to Lincoln Road, J had a massive premonition; what if the Duck Tour breaks down. We both laughed and just went on our happy way.

Boarding the ship went fine, the tour guide Sam seemed excited as were we. After about 20 minutes of driving we went on the water ramp and Boom!, we were in the water. After about 15 minutes Sam seemingly went off script. His tour facts of the life of Miami’s rich were starting to come at us very quickly and with no particular purpose. Soon, he signaled several people to change seats. I thought I was seeing things as smoke seemed to have briefly arisen from those seats, but I’m sure it’s just my mind playing tricks on me; minus bush wack bill of course.

Then, after several slow moving minutes, we somehow made it back on the ramp to land and almost immediately the Duck boat began smoke/steam and died.

We were told a new one would arrive any minute to pick us up. We were told to wait by a city Japanese garden. We made due and downloaded a plant app to identify the weird orange plant that was growing; it was some sort of palm. But, after 15 minutes, The ever beautiful, J, had had enough and we got an Uber back to Lincoln road.

I was fully reimbursed and the lady at the office was very apologetic.

Conclusion? If your date has astral projections that your duck tour will break down, you probably shouldn’t go. Otherwise, it makes for a cooL story that none of your friends will find interesting or...

I’ve done the duck tours before in Chicago and LA and was expecting a similar experience in Miami but unfortunately that was not the case. To be clear, the tour guide gets a FIVE STAR review. I think his name was Chris or Maybe Jim, but in any case, he was personable, funny (but not in the annoying super corny kind of funny; like legit funny) and pointed out the interesting facts of the city as well. However, as I recall from my previous duck tours experiences, people choose this tour over the standard celebrity home viewing tour/sightseeing tour because of the fun aspect added it to it, hence the name “duck tours”. I recall getting these cute duck whistles which we got to blow at different moments of the tour. It added a fun element to an overall slow moving sightseeing tour that was not provided this time around. Speaking of slow moving, that kind of sums up my experience. Unlike last times when there were moments in which the captain sped up the boat allowing for a nice breeze and perhaps even a splash or two of water, this entire ride was at snails pace. Keep in mind that Miami’s summers can hit above 90 degrees and the sun is even stronger out on the water. I looked around and everyone was sweating buckets looking bored and waiting for the action to start. There was even a moment where the captain announced an intermission and turned on some lively music, but the speed of the boat continued at a slow pace that felt nothing more than bobbing with the oceans waves. We were barely moving. In any case, the tour was fine but if you advertise with the “duck tour” distinction that is supposed to differentiate you from the multitudes or other celebrity home viewing tours/sightseeing tours, then please have SOMETHING that alludes to that...