Sultan Pepper ( HALAL ) — Restaurant in Houston

"Subject Matter Expert, also referred to as SME, is a person who has special skills or knowledge on a particular job or topic."

Having grown up in the Middle East with 2 decades of Middle Eastern experience, I have been extremely fortunate to have tasted 2000+ shawarmas, in the Middle East alone. Across the rest of the world, I estimate my shawarma-interactions to be in excess of a 1000.

This qualifies me to be a SME on shawarmas.

Sultan Pepper at Galleria mall. This place came recommended by a trustworthy source, hence I transplanted myself at these coordinates with baited anticipation. I enter with a silly grin on my face, greeting the staff with great vigor and zest.

"Hello! I hear you dabble in shawarmas." "We do." "Excellent. I'm looking for an epic shawarma." "Very good Sir. How can we help?" "Glad you asked. Ready? Alright. May I please sample the following, separately, in the following order - marinated chicken, toum (garlic paste), pickle."

I proceed to taste all 3.

Marinated chicken: Well-seasoned and juicy all the way through, while maintaining a rebellious char on the surface.

Toum: Delicious, fluffy, cloud-like, no smell of mayo/egg (kudos on getting this right!)

Pickle: Crunchy and tasty.

Satisfied with the preliminary test, I request a spicy chicken shawarma. I ask to customize it. They graciously oblige.

"Please grill the pita bread, briefly. Next, please spread toum on the bread as you usually do, only double. Hot sauce may now be mixed into the toum and spread evenly to cover 100% of the bread's surface with the 'spicy toum' mix. Please grill the chicken so as to slightly-char the surface. You may now gently place the slightly-charred chicken on this creamy, heavenly mess. Next, please lay the pickles on top of the chicken, ensuring every bite experiences its crunch. Now, you may spill a handful of crispy fries on top, followed by a sprinkle of freshly chopped parsley and black pepper. Proceed to roll up the shawarma and place on the grill, as you would. Before serving it, please sprinkle sumac (spice) on the shawarma and on the side order of fries. Last but not the least, please provide me with a bucket of toum to dip my shawarma and fries into."

I sit down, getting ready to unwrap this concoction. I acquire tunnel vision. The rest of the world fades away.

I tear away the paper to expose the hot, steaming shawarma. I hear my heart pounding in my ears. The steam from the shawarma forms shapes in the air. Shapes of shawarmas. I approach the shawarma with trembling lips. I feel the heat as I get closer. I open my mouth and I take my 1st bite.

Shawarma-Man, Shawarma-Man, eats a shawarma, when he can.

I take a 2nd bite. I dip the shawarma into the fluffy toum and take a 3rd. I feel the hair on my neck and on my arms rising. I try to make sense of the emotions flowing through me.

I had just tasted the best shawarma that I've had in Houston. A beautiful symphony of crunchy, juicy textures, well-marinated chicken, delicious pickles, crispy french fries et al.

I am one with the shawarma. I am complete. My only recommendation to the fine staff at this establishment is to explore adding more lemon to the toum, to give it that 'je ne sais quoi" factor.

A big thank you to the excellent staff for their admirable patience with my requests. You are the best.

See you in...

I came here a few times, but this time, it was literally the worst. I always eat middle eastern and Mediterranean food all the time, but they make it worst for you. I ask for sauce, you guys get mad or say no. The sauce isn't even the traditional garlic sauce. It's literally mayonnaise. Some old man is cooking the chicken kabob and meat halfway and then reheating it, touching it without washing your hands. Have you ever learned of food safety and salmonella? The tabouli tastes like GRASS, no lemon, tastes oily and dry. Your calling people dumb and idiots when you guys don't even know how to cook middle eastern food. I payed about 98 dollars for my family to eat for your trashy service and disgusting food that you burn and reheat without washing your hands. The health inspection needs to be called on you guys. I got sick last time I ate your chicken kabobs and decided to give you guys another try, but it was a huge bad idea. You guys just lost a customer, for being rude and unhygienic. For the girls that keep rolling their eyes just because I asked for extra sauce, don't be annoyed because if you are, just quit the job if you don't like it. Also, you guys put small ass portions, not even a normal quantity. Quality and quantity is shitty for you...

Every time I come here lately they are very disorganized and the service is not like it used to be. They are very rude to their customers. They have it posted a combo with fries or the other combo with salad. I guess they no longer serve fries but instead of telling customers they say you can get a salad instead and then charge you extra for the soda on the side. I tried to explain that if your front worker is saying you can get a salad instead I think it’s reasonable to assume that you’re substituting the fries with the salad. If they would have said from the beginning that because we don’t have fries we don’t offer combo 1 anymore and the soda would be separate, I then can make the decision if I want to continue or not. They have done something to this to a co-worker of mine and the people in front of me even brought up last time they were there they were uncharged $3 and they didn’t want to do that again. The food is amazing but they are coming off shady and very...