TIAN — Restaurant in Vienna

Freshly invigorated in our vegetarian beliefs following the Morrissey gig the night before, we thought we'd seal our romantic weekend in Vienna with the finest vegetarian food known to humanity. And this was it! A fancy restaurant serving haute cuisine of organic vegetables displayed in a frippery of nothingness and all the toss of of the ceremonialism that goes with serving it.

I fear I'm playing my hand too quickly here. The beautiful interior of this classic traditional high-ceilinged Viennese restaurant was numbed with dull lighting that added a greyish waness to the pale grey green interior, perhaps to disguise the grey-green pallor of the guests dining there (they couldn't light the chandeliers a they were made from sticks and hops and candles - duh). It certainly didn't do the appearance of the food any favours either - the chef had clearly gone to great lengths to make the art on a plate that was presented to us (the artist being my five year old godson).

The ambient musak playing in the restaurant was a sign of attempting to achieve perhaps a 'look aren't we cool, we like 1990's Ibiza chill-out music' vibe, but made me want to get out of the elevator as soon as possible. Quite honestly no music and just the tinkling sounds of gay laughter and customers having a jolly time would've been preferable. But that didn't happen either. No no, not the type of people that could afford to eat here - one clearly a regular, a trustafarian who got shoulder massages from the incredibly un-friendly waiter, were either on a first date, health-conscious elderly couples, or a group on an annual George Michael fan-club reunion dinner where only three of them had turned up at the large table.

So first we were given a menu with no explanation how it worked (a menu on one page listing 6-7 dishes plus prices, some options and prices in the middle - 4 tasters = 78 Euros; 6 tasters a lot more, and so forth; plus wine paring at 40 Euros, and another menu on the third page with 6-7 dishes with prices next to them). Having humiliatingly had to ask the sniffy waiter (that looked just like Pete Townsend) how the menu works, he loosely explained what was expected of us. We did what we loosely thought was expected of us and ordered four courses each, and a glass of wine each - I picked a red for my partner, and when I chose one from a list that didn't specify it's colour, the sniffy Pete Townsend said 'Zat is a white wine' with an ever so slight curl to his lip. Perhaps I had deliberately chosen a white wine? But he scared me so I picked the same as the one I had chosen for my partner.

The food started arriving, starting with a tiny pea-sized luke-warm potato rosti with a drip of sauce - compliments of the chef - that basically tasted like a luke-warm deep fried potato rosti. Don't get me wrong, some of it was good - the pasta with the truffles - some of it was OK - the peanut butter jelly - and some of it was terrible - the pumpkin thing with just weird flavours that should never be on the same plate. The raspberry sorbet palate cleanser before the main made a refreshing change from the traditional lemon sorbet, but the raspberry sugary biscuit thing that came with it was a terrible idea as it stuck in your teeth and did the opposite of what it was meant to do.

When the desert came, the 'Mars explodes' or something, I took the mini-Mars bar I happened to have in my pocket out and took a photo of it next to the food. Pete Townsend saw and rolled his eyes. He was a nob.

To sum up, the food was over-priced, the ambience zero, the service rude and snooty, and their logo terrible. We left very much the poorer and I had to buy us a pizza on the way home plus now I'm not allowed to choose the restaurant for the next 10...

I was very excited to try out Tian, there are few vegetarian restaurants about at this price point. Overall the experience was average and sadly I find it hard to recommend going.

Food - It was good, it was not "wow" which is what you would expect when charging 2 to 3 Michelin star prices. I have had much better vegetarian tasting menus at non vegetarian restaurants all over the world.

Service - the staff frankly are underwhelming. Our head waiter looked as if everything he did for us was an effort and he could barely crack a smile. In defense the wait staff that brought our food were a lot more cheery. There was a fly buzzing around (it happens I know) which eventually ended up in my glass of wine.. The sommelier (who also doubles as a food waiter) asked if I would like him to take the fly out or pour the glass away. He offered nothing in the way of compensation, and it was only after complaining and some cajoling that he agreed to discount a glass of wine off of the bill. Frankly at any other restaurant at this price range firstly there wouldn't be a fly, and secondly I wouldn't have to haggle to feel compensated.

Ambience - Drab at best, there was nothing of any particular excitement and it certainly did not feel as if we were eating at a high end eatery or anywhere particularly special.

Overall - If the service and Ambience were better this could pass as mutton dressed like lamb (bad analogy) but as stood I find it hard to rate this place too highly. Frankly I am surprised this place has a Michelin star (probably because there are few high end vegetarian only...

Wir befinden uns im „Himmel“, in der Himmelpfortgasse, wo uns das 8-Gang Menü erwartet. Kaum Platz genommen und mit dem Aperitif auf einen wundervollen Abend angestoßen, saßen wir auch schon vor dem ersten Gang. Zugegebenermaßen hat uns die Lautstärke der Musik, gleich von Beginn an, sehr gestört. Ich habe bereits in anderen Rezensionen gelesen, dass sowohl die Art, als auch die Lautstärke der Musik, zum Konzept gehören. Wir aber unterhalten uns ganz gerne bei Tisch und brüllen uns weniger gerne an ;-) Zudem war es aufgrund der Lautstärke sehr schwierig, dem Servicepersonal bei der Vorstellung des Weins, oder des gerade servierten Gerichtes zu folgen. Das Menü: Die Auswahl der menübegleitenden Weine war exzellent getroffen und wirklich perfekt auf die Komponenten des jeweiligen Gangs abgestimmt. Viel Zeit, die jeweiligen Weine zu genießen, hatten wir jedoch nicht (siehe unten). Bis bei einem solchen Menü alle Gänge serviert werden, vergeht selbstverständlich ein wenig Zeit. Das Servieren der Gänge und das Abräumen der leeren Teller war mir persönlich aber viel zu hektisch und zu rasant. Die Hand des Servicepersonals, als auch meine Gabel, welche ich im Begriff war abzulegen, erreichten den leeren Teller fast zeitgleich ;-)

Da wir den Abend und das Essen aber mehr genießen wollten, erbaten wir uns ein wenig Zeit zwischen den Gängen. Dem Wunsch wurde leider nicht entsprochen. Als beim folgenden Gang dann mein leerer Teller bereits vom Tisch genommen wurde, als mein Partner gerade noch den letzten Bissen mit der Gabel Richtung Mund beförderte, war ich dann doch ein wenig verärgert. Freundlich lächelnd, spülten wir den aufkommenden Ärger mit ein wenig Wein hinunter.

Da die Gänge also weiterhin „hoppla hopp“ serviert wurden, standen für jeden immer 2 Weingläser auf dem Tisch, da wir es zwar geschafft hatten die Teller in vorgegebenem Tempo zu leeren, nicht aber die Weingläser. Dieses hatte zur Folge, dass wir die Reste des vorherigen Weines immer schnell „runterschütten“ mussten, damit wir den passenden Wein zum aktuellen Gang genießen konnte. Sonst hätten wir irgendwann vermutlich 6 oder mehr Weingläser auf dem Tisch gehabt ;-)

Hat es geschmeckt? 7 der 8 Gänge schmeckten mir wirklich vorzüglich. Alleine der Lauch in einem der Gänge, erschien mir persönlich (!) ein wenig „wässrig“. Ansonsten war alles geschmacklich wirklich hervorragend 😊.

Irgendwann nach dem letzten Gang hat mich dann aber folgende Ansprache des Servicepersonals sehr verärgert: „Bitte denken Sie daran, dass wir in zwei Minuten schliessen….!“

Hoppla, das hatte ich noch in keinem Restaurant erlebt. Sicherlich passiert es einem nicht immer, dass sich zu späterer Stunde der „Maître de Cuisine“ mit einer Flasche Digestif zu den Gästen an den Tisch gesellt, aber „hinauskomplimentiert“ wurde ich auch noch nie. Zumal mein Lebensgefährte (für alle ersichtlich, da auf dem nackten Boden kniend 😉) mir einen Heiratsantrag