Esquires Cafe - Tower Junction — Restaurant in Christchurch

Let me tell you a story, Well... well... well... It all started at lunchtime with a humble sausage roll, it looked delicious - smelt delicious voluptuous and plump just like a sausage roll should. Unfortunately the taste was bland, it tasted like cardboard but of course I continued to eat it because I just spent $9 this sausage roll. Little did I know the consequences 5 hours later... What started out as a humble evening at a friends house turned into a Black Ops Mission to get home to my throne. 80Kms in a 50Km Zone frantically trying to find refuge in a bush, a pub, a service station... IM GOING TO LOSE THE SECURITY DEPOSIT ON MY RENTAL CAR. As I turned the corner onto Riccarton Road I spot a BP on the corner to the distant left... The convulsions start... My body can sense a toilet is near... I feel as if I'm 12 hours deep into a strenuous labor for triplets... The lights are off... the service station is closed.. I go round the back and pray to ALLAH, BUDAH, CHRIST... THE TOILET DOOR is open near the mechanic shop.. ITS PITCH BLACK... I fling my car door open...headlights on the motor running. The humble Toyota beeps at me to remind me the ignition is still on... I stumble into the dark dingey toilet. The light is not working.. at this point an explosion of magic occurs. BYE BYE...

This would have to be the worst food I have had in a cafe ever!!! First off I ordered a hot chocolate and a piece of vege quiche and the prompt service by a pleasant young man fronted up with a lukewarm drink that I took back immediately and asked for a “hot chocolate” not a cold one. The quiche was not far behind and there was not a leaf of complementary greens accompanying this piece of insipid looking quiche which had small lumps of carrot in it and a ring of orange looking syrup around the edge of the plate!! Hungry and ready to give this a go I launched in with gusto only to discover this piece of vegetable quiche actually tasted like nothing and was so bland and even the carrots did not play a part. This tasteless disgusting quiche that I paid $11.50 for should have been put in front of the person who made it and asked them where were the veges that should have been it and what about the seasonings and what about creating yummy food that people would come back for time and time again. This place is obviously a franchise and no standards or checks have been adhered to. Do not go here you can find somewhere much much better within the Tower Junction shopping complex. So...

The cafe and food is nicely presented. The only problem I had was a staff member was so unwilling to help us out. My 5 year old son is noticeably autistic and he loves cookies, it is the only thing he wanted but he doesn't like chocolate so the chocolate chip cookies on offer were not what he wanted. He cannot help that he is so particular about his food(he has a dietician). I knew that they had gingernut biscuits, he will eat these so I explained my situation, and the woman behind the counter would not help us even though I said we would pay the price of their big cookies. No help. So my son went without. I understand that there may be legal issues in selling on product. But I assured her I wouldn't say anything and we go to many cafes around the city and we are always accommodated. It makes the difference between a good relaxing coffee and a child who is being difficult because he has sensory problems he cannot control. I am not being entitled. A very tense and difficult time. It could have been made better with a...