Ann's Smart School of Cookery — Attraction in London

Ann’s Smart School of Cookery – The most misleading title you’ll ever read.

My girlfriend and I were bought the “Thai Explosion” cooking class at West India Quay as a present. Having attended other cooking classes from other companies in the past, we were quite excited for this one. Upon our arrival, we were greeted and sat down by one of the members of staff. This was the most pleasant part of the evening. After this, the host discussed the meal plan for the evening, and once our drinks were served, the class started. Groups were called up in pairs to undertake different aspects of the meal preparation. We were delegated the following tasks: cutting vegetables, frying a handful of onions and sauteeing some vegetables. My girlfriend was also tasked with drying the onions by tossing them in cornflour. When she told the host that they were still a bit wet, he somehow managed to unnecessarily sexualise the comment, stating that she should, and I quote: “not say things like that around me. Especially because I am in a profession where I’m surrounded by women all day.”

As far as the class goes, this was the end of our teaching, as everything else was carried out by other class participants…completely unsupervised. The spring rolls were the most disturbing part of the class and meal itself. We were asked by the host not to take any pictures of the class or food, which is understandable, because if we did, Ann Hood would probably be horrified.

My girlfriend and I struck up a conversation with the couple next to us, as the host was at the other end of the class paying no heed to any of the participants on our end of the room. Alas, our attempt at salvaging a somewhat enjoyable experience from this class was immediately shut down by the host, who told us that we were being too “excited” and asked us to calm down so he could teach the class. He then continued to only speak to the half of the class that was on the other side of the room. By this point, we suspected that the quality of the class was reflective of the quality of the food we were to be presented with; mediocre at best. However, the meal managed to be the star of the show, being the most immeasurably disappointing part of the whole evening. We were served morsels that would leave a starving desert rat unappreciative. Both quality and quantity of the food were extremely sub-par, especially when considering the price paid for the class. While a picture would paint a thousand words, I must remind you that we were told at the beginning of the class that no photography was allowed. Suffice to say, we completely understood why by the end of the evening.

All in all, the class was abysmal, the evening was horrendous, and I would absolutely not recommend that anyone waste their time, money or sanity on this class...

Honestly the only good thing about this was the chef was a very nice man, however the food was the furthest thing from Spanish and genuinely wasn't very good at all. Paella was made using pudding rice and was cooked like a risotto which isn't how paella is supposed to be cooked. He also used boullion powder to make the stock for the paella, which tbh felt like such a cop out concidering you can buy redily made stock in bags. Meatballs were seriously the worst meatballs I've ever eaten in my life, they really were shockingly bad with 0 seasoning. He made a really nice dressing for the tortilla/frittata/whatever it was and my friend enjoyed the prawns. The only cooking we done was stirring mushrooms and grating chilis but we didn't actually cook a dish as it was set out in a way where each team gets up and does a bit of prep and it went down the line. There was also a cross contamination problem and the lady next to us had to ask the chef to remove the board that have been used for seafood, which you would expect a chef to not have to be told. It's worrying that for some people who have never really cooked they will assume this is good food and the correct methods. I expected higher standards from someone who came close to winning Masterchef.

We were warned not to give a negative review online as apparently Ann gets very upset and we 'didn't want Ann coming for us' and that we should email directly (genuinely felt like some kind of threat to be honest) and I made it clear that I'd be giving an honest review and Ann can deal with it quite frankly. Wasn't allowed to take photos which was put down to privacy laws, however as most other big cooking classes allow photos to be taken I suspect the real reason is because they don't want people to see how bad the food is. I have several chefs in the family so I've been lucky enough to have been exposed to some really nice food, this really wasn't it sadly.

Spend an extra £50 and do a proper cooking class. This really felt like the biggest waste of money, thankfully we had a bottle of procecco to get...

We arrived on time and there was a chaotic first 10 minutes as the required cooking utensils, drinks for class etc were not out and ready. The class too full, we were all so squished in that our shoulders were touching the shoulders of the attendees on either side.

As enthusiastic cooks, we were somewhat patronised with the first half hour being taught how to crack an eggs and cut onions. We imagined that for pasta making and gnocchi that the class wouldn’t be quite so “beginners basic”.

We were expecting a more inclusive class. This was very much a demonstration class with attendees getting up and cutting an onion or kneading the pasta but also with so many people in one space, it was hard for people at one end to see all the way to the other end of the counter.

No food can leave the premises but it’s not very clear and one assumes after attending many other courses that you take home the food that you’ve cooked … however 5 minutes of getting up and stirring or kneading is not cooking.

I have attended classes at Sauce, The Langham; La Cucina Calder, sushi making at Yo Sushi and Cookery School, Little Portland Street. All of these have been so hands on, not at all patronising and we have taken home skills and food. I highly recommend any of these but this school is a waste of money. We made excuses and walked out half way through … that’s an hour of our lives we will never get back.

I write a lot of reviews and never bad ones but I emailed the head office twice with the above and after chasing a reply they told me to put in letter and post to their head office without even a mention of apology that we were disappointed. It’s 2024 and the expectation that we must send a formal letter in the mail just confirms how out of touch they are with todays business practise (also made clear when we arrived at the class and we were told we could not take photos of the...