Lolito Cantina — Restaurant in Stillwater

How I Nearly Became a Burrito Bachelor: A Romantic Misadventure at Lolito’s

Today, I finally took my beloved wife on a date to the enchanting city of Stillwater, Minnesota, a first in decades of our matrimonial bliss. Much to our delight, we stumbled upon the city's 89th Lumberjack Festival, which was as quirky as it was nostalgic. Just the perfect backdrop for a romantic date! However, our romantic detour led us to a Mexican joint named Lolito, armed with absolutely no expectations.

As we arrived, a rather indifferent individual, with all the personal charm of a cold burrito, threw a casual question at us about our seating preference - indoors or al fresco. Opting for the great outdoors, we sauntered to the patio, me hoping to coo sweet nothings to my better half in relative solitude.

Ah, the serenity! That was until the smell of - let's call it "unprocessed fertilizer" - hit us right in the nostrils. First, we panicked, then frantically checked our shoes. With the mystery of the unwelcome aroma unresolved and service conspicuously absent, we found ourselves the unwilling center of a hovering swarm of flies. In a desperate attempt to combat the aroma, my wife pulled out a magic spray from her all-sufficient handbag. Ladies and their handbags - they hold everything, except the kitchen sink!

In the end, with still no sight of menus, staff, or even basic service, we made a tactical retreat indoors. The air inside was as fresh as a daisy field, which after our ordeal, was nothing short of paradise.

Our waitress Claudia was kind enough to lay out the dire straits of the pork belly shortage - a personal catastrophe, as I harbor a soft spot for it. The announcement of a nearby bachelor party of 12 proved to be the final nail in my Rico Suave ambitions. Loud chatter and merriment - not the most conducive environment for romance, I daresay.

Our orders were promptly placed - Shrimp Tacos for my wife, and a Steak Burrito Bowl for yours truly. To my embarrassment, we discovered that this restaurant charged for chips and salsa - something I wish we had been privy to earlier.

Our meals were served by a wordless lad who pointed out the silverware with all the grace of a disgruntled caveman. The utensils in question were precariously stashed in a wooden basket in front of us. My dear wife, struggling with her overgrown shrimp, sought Claudia's attention. Alas, Claudia was engrossed with the bachelor party. My heroic instincts kicked in and I unveiled a cache of actual cutlery wrapped in cloth napkins. Huzzah!

As we munched through our food, my wife made several attempts to procure hot sauce - to no avail. I comforted her with the sobering reality of far worse predicaments, like the war in Ukraine, but the hot sauce remained a sore spot.

Eventually, Claudia returned to our table, just in time to swipe my credit card. She uttered an apology for a crime unknown. A kind bachelor party attendee happily played photographer for us, capturing our evening of trials and tribulations. Even Claudia attempted to salvage the situation with another picture, sans the glare. But alas, the damage was done.

Lolito, for all its olfactory surprises and adventurous service, you earned a hard-fought 2 stars. The food wasn't half bad. However, I am certain my wife and I won't be embarking on another romantic expedition to your establishment...

This was a tough one. After loving the other 2 sister properties so much, we decided to give this one another go. We also felt we had a better understanding of the concept & there's signage now - woohoo!

As you see my 3 stars and brace yourself for a bad review, this is where it gets interesting. We came in as a party of 4, shortly after 7pm. We were told a 15min wait, we agreed, used the restrooms & the table was ready.

On being seated, we were given the specials list & told the only thing they were out of was the lobster salad. Easy enough. We were given 4 empty water glasses and menus. 20 minutes later, we were told the water was coming. We still hadn't ordered. A bit more time passed, and the gal popped over with a water bottle that filled 3.5 of the glasses. Still hadn't ordered. At this point, we were debating whether it would make sense to leave & go elsewhere or continue to wait. She came back with 2 full water bottles & we rattled off our orders. I do wish we'd been warned the lobster skewer special wouldn't cut it for a meal. I didn't think to ask. My mistake.

During the ordering process, we found out that they were also out of shrimp, brisket & fries... all of which were on our attempted orders. Rocky start, but it's sure to improve.

Hubs ordered chimichurri for his bowl, we were charged 50 cents for it but it wasn't sent out & I wasn't about to ask for a 50 cent charge to be removed. 2 of us had opted for the lobster skewer- 1 came out with chimichurri and the other didn't. About now, you're probably wondering why we didn't point it out to get it fixed. It's a valid question. The simple answer, we didn't see the server again until all dishes were empty & moved to the side. When she came to bill us, I did ask for an order of Hanger Steak Tacos to go, as the tasty but tiny lobster skewer wasn't going to cut it.

The bills showed the other couples guacamole order on our bill, but it wasn't ours (resolved it between ourselves) &, again, the chimichurri charge for food not received. By this point, We've also now been here for 2hrs.

Recap: Seated faster than expected, waited a LONG time for service, out of several things - tho we were told initially only out of 1 - meaning 3 of 4 had to change their order - food came out incorrect & before the drinks, no check-ins once food came up, then billed incorrectly & everything took way longer than it should have in the end.

Twist: the food was REALLY good! I ate the (to-go) Hanger Steak Tacos and wish I'd ordered them to start. The hubs had the Hanger Steak Burrito Bowl & loved it too, even tho his chimichurri never made it out. The steak was well-seasoned, tender, juicy & the serving size was perfect on both the tacos & the burrito bowl. The lobster skewer was also tasty, tho I'd skip it next time & save ordering lobster for East Coast. Another person had the Pork Quesadilla and thought it was excellent. It certainly looked it to me too, but I didn't try it.

So, would I go back- yes, I'd give them another try. Maybe our gal was new, maybe it was a long day. She was very nice...

I don’t normally leave bad reviews as Im also a waitress in the food industry myself, but our experience here was horrible. Me & my boyfriend came in today which happens to also be my birthday so we were really looking forward to having a beautiful day in Stillwater & decided on eating here for lunch, the place is gorgeous & had a great atmosphere as well, the menu looked amazing online so we were pretty excited to try it. Overall one of the worst service experiences I’ve had & I don’t say this lightly since I’m again a waitress myself but our server walked by us multiple times as we ate & said absolutely nothing even after making eye contact with us, she went to all her other tables & was very kind & seemed to care about how their food was & was much more attentive to the others than us. Also went around cleaning up her other tables around us & still said nothing as we ate not even a smile, she finally came by after we finished eating & asked if she could get us anything else very quickly & then walked away to get us the tab, she then dropped the book back off after we paid & didn’t even look at us once then as she was walking away said “happy birthday” as if she clearly did not care. So disappointed I just don’t know what we had did wrong or if she just didn’t like us because we were younger but definitely didn’t make me feel good especially on my birthday. Also was disappointed with how small the food portions were also & the waitress even talked us down from a lunch combo to a regular since she had claimed it was a smaller amount of food which was not accurate as the entree sized quesadilla was literally two pieces & came with nothing, hardly any chicken in it as well. Took well over 20-25 minutes for our food to come out also which again wasn’t large portions so it was overall not a good experience even if the food did have decent flavor. Very disappointed & will not be...